How To Destroy an Airman in 60 Days
She was starting to believe in herself again.
Then she encountered the first sergeant, the enforced silence, the laughter—
and everything she’d rebuilt began to fell apart.
Piece by piece. Trauma by trauma.
She rebuilt herself in basic training. Her first duty station shattered her again.
The Brutal Reality
Meet Lakeydra Houston, an Air Force veteran who joined the military seeking purpose after surviving childhood trauma. In this episode, she shares how basic training offered her confidence, but the career that followed delivered betrayal. From harassment and sexual assault by a predatory leader to numbing the pain through alcohol and enduring domestic violence, Lakeydra’s story is both harrowing and heartbreakingly familiar for many women in uniform.
Lakeydra describes her path into the military, which is a path many of us have walked. After struggling in college and coping with past trauma through volleyball, she decided to join the Air Force for a fresh start. Despite initial reluctance and the shock of September 11th, she found herself inspired by the recruiter’s promise of becoming a doctor or physical therapist—only to later discover she’d unknowingly signed an open general contract. Basic training was a culture shock, but it also gave her a sense of pride and purpose once she found her footing. Her transformation into a confident airman marked the first time she truly felt accomplished—until her assignment to Security Forces reintroduced the very violence she’d tried to escape.
The Punchline: Assaults, Silence, and Systemic Betrayal
She was reporting in, doing exactly what every new Airman does when they reach their first assignment. Lakeydra opens up about her horrifying encounter with a first sergeant who groped her suggesting she needed a “harmless” fix on her uniform. When she fled his office, a fellow airman warned her not to report him—because she had, and was being discharged for it. What’s worse: the men in Lakeydra’s unit already knew he had a reputation. They laughed about it. Lakeydra was silenced, shamed, and eventually pushed toward alcoholism as a way to cope. Surrounded by a toxic drinking culture and carrying a weapon every day, she was emotionally unraveling—and no one noticed. No one intervened.
Entering The Loop: Loss, Pregnancy, and Deployment
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The spiral continued. Lakeydra entered into a volatile relationship, became pregnant, and was deployed just six weeks after giving birth. She wasn’t physically or emotionally ready. While serving in Dubai, the violence and harassment continued—this time involving officers and friends too scared or ashamed to report what happened. Eventually access to alcohol was cut off, but not before the damage was done to numerous people. When Lakeydra got a call that her husband had been shot, she didn’t want to return home.
Somehow, being overseas felt safer than being with the man she didn’t trust.
Above All Else
Lakeydra’s story quickly exposes how a toxic command climate and male-dominated culture enabled repeat offenders to thrive while silencing survivors. For many, systemic betrayal compounds personal trauma.
If you’re still wondering if your pain “counts” or if you’re the only one—this episode proves otherwise. Lakeydra hopes her courage helps other survivors understand they’re not alone, and that they can get out of the loop that they’re stuck in with support and help from advocates, trustworthy leadership, and mental health treatment and services.
“Going to the military was my way to start over and feel like I had a purpose in life.”
- Lakeydra
Click here to explore more survivor stories
If you’re still wondering if your pain “counts” or if you’re the only one—this episode proves otherwise. Lakeydra hopes her courage helps other survivors understand they’re not alone, and that they can get out of the loop that they’re stuck in with support and help from advocates, trustworthy leadership, and mental health treatment and services.
Links
This episode contains a few references to news articles and books that are listed below:
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This episode contains a few references to news articles and books that are listed below:
☎️ SA Support for the DoD Community, contact the DoD Safe Helpline: https://www.sapr.mil/dod-safe-helpline
☎️ If you are in crisis or need immediate support, call the Veterans Crisis Line: 988, then 1
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Episode Trigger Warning Index
This episode contains references to the following topics. Please use this guide to skip if needed:
1:36 Mention of CSA, drug use for coping
3:30 - 4:56 Discussion of September 11th
7:36 Mentions of loss of sister
9:07 Mentions of loss of parent from gun violence
09:49 - 10:59 Discussion of harassment/ SA, at tech school as a woman in male-dominated space
11:26 - 22:39 Detailed discussion of SA’s, childhood trauma, abuse of power, predatory leadership, male peers making light of and committing SA, trauma responses to SA, self-blame, alcohol abuse, domestic violence, pregnancy, lost lives due to lack of mental health resources, witnessing a friend take their life, SI, deployment soon after giving birth, family members that were veterans of the Vietnam War and their mental health and coping with alcohol
23:02 - 29:11 SA’s on deployment due to alcohol and abuse of power, feeling unable to report due to rank structure, feeling powerless to protect friends, domestic violence, gun violence, being stuck in a trauma cycle, lies and betrayal by spouse, alcohol abuse, financial abuse
Takeaways from Part 1
Lakeydra joined the Air Force to start over after trauma that occurred in childhood..
Basic training was a significant challenge for her, but ultimately led to a newfound sense of accomplishment and confidence in herself..
She faced harassment and assault during her service immediately and was warned to not speak up by another victim, while her male peers laughed about the perpetrator and his reputation for being “nasty”.
Coping with alcohol, and hiding in partying with everyone else became a way to numb her pain.
Mental health was not openly discussed in the military when she served.
Deployment and alcohol’s availability brought new gender-based challenges and experiences.
Support from leadership made a difference in her journey.
Seeking help and connecting with others is instrumental in traumatic situations.
Lakeydra's story emphasizes the need for mental health awareness in the military.
Reflection Journal Prompt
Have you ever felt like you were caught in a trauma loop or cycle?
Spend a few minutes after listening to reflect or journal. What did you feel during this episode? What are you still thinking about? What systems need to change — and what part could you play in that change?
Join the Conversation & Amplify Survivors
Want to talk through your experience? Or support someone else in theirs?
Join our private Facebook group: The Advocates of MST
Don’t forget. This conversation matters. And MSTy showed immense courage by telling her story. Please help us make sure her voice travels further: Leaving a written review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts helps elevate the visibility of the show for more survivors suffering in isolation and pain. A simple review can change another person’s life forever.
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Need Support?
Although this podcast is a great resource, it does not and should not replace care from a medical professional. If you’re in crisis or need someone to talk to:
Call the Veterans Crisis Line — 988, then press 1
Or go to the nearest emergency room.
You are not alone. We believe you. You matter.
The final part in Lakeydra’s two part series goes live Tuesday May 7, 2025.
