Military Sexual Trauma — I Was Told to Get Over It
A former U.S. Air Force veteran shares her firsthand account of harassment, retaliation, and Military Sexual Trauma within the ranks. Her story reveals how systemic failures and abusive leadership drive survivors into silence, and how writing became her path to recovery. Read this guest post on The Silenced Voices of MST to understand the hidden cost of Military Sexual Trauma and what accountability must look like inside the armed forces.
Guest Post: Rhea Nocturne shares the experience of being a woman in the Air Force.
In this guest post, a former Airman shares how years of ignored warnings, harassment, and retaliation broke her spirit long before she ever left the service. Her story exposes how leadership weaponized indifference and called it discipline.
To some, it may come as a surprise, but I didn’t join the military out of patriotic duty. Like many others, I joined to escape — from hardship, from abuse — and to use it as a stepping stone toward a better life.
To my dismay, I was thrown into another cycle of abuse — this time at the hands of multiple people, within a system that too often protects the wrong ones.
I entered the military like everyone else: greeted by the yelling of MTIs. But I wasn’t fazed. My father had been a wannabe MTI himself, so to me, it felt like just another game of survival. During that time, I discovered something genuine: a sense of sisterhood. We were determined to prove — not just to leadership but to ourselves — that we were more than capable. The female MTIs were by far the toughest, and we had to be tougher. We had to outperform the men in every aspect.
I was even told by some of my fellow Airmen that I came across as “intimidating.” I took that as a compliment — a reflection of the discipline and strength BMT instilled in me.
At my first duty station, I met some incredible people who I still consider family to this day. But I also came face-to-face with the darker realities of military culture. And while I now understand the importance of holding on to the good, I can’t deny the damage the bad left behind.
When Harassment Became Normal
There was a male airman on our dorm floor who would stand at his door and watch every time a woman walked by. The moment he heard female voices — or even heels — he would run to his peephole, then crack his door open to stare. It was unsettling. A reminder that, even in uniform, we weren’t safe from predatory behavior.
Another time, a male roommate — a friend of my boyfriend at the time — slashed my tires on multiple occasions. I reported it to leadership, but was told that because it happened off-base, there was nothing they could do. It wasn’t until the third incident — which included slashing my boyfriend’s tires — that they finally stepped in. Even then, they did the bare minimum: he was ordered to pay restitution and attend anger management.
Years later, that same man was arrested for stealing from a commander’s office. This was after already being caught breaking into the BX while deployed and mailing stolen Xboxes home. And yet, he was allowed to continue his career far longer than he ever should have.
I once had an airfield manager tell me point-blank that women shouldn’t be allowed to deploy. His reasoning? That when women “hang out” with men downrange, it sends the wrong message, and it’s the men who get in trouble. He even told me about his own situation — claiming he was wrongly accused and that it was the woman’s fault for being around him.
Not long after that, I was sent on a last-minute deployment. To say I was scared would be an understatement.
The conditions were harsh — hot, chaotic, and foul-smelling. During the in-brief, the women were pulled aside and told to walk in groups due to a rise in sexual assaults. We were warned that many of the men on base had just returned from traumatic areas and “weren’t right in the head.” The message was clear: for our safety, stay together. Don’t walk alone.
That was the military’s version of protection — placing the responsibility on women to prevent being assaulted, instead of addressing the problem at its source.
Later during that deployment, my new airfield manager — a good man — informed me that he had to request special permission from the Qatari airfield leadership for me to be there. They approved it, but under strict guidelines: I could attend inspections, but only if I sat in the back, didn’t drive, and avoided eye contact or conversation with them.
One moment sticks with me. The Qatari team came by to ask for a radio. I placed it on the counter in front of them, and one of the men looked at me with disgust — as if to say, “How dare you?” He then turned to my male coworker, who picked up the radio and handed it to him directly. Only then did the man accept it.
“I didn’t speak up — out of fear that I would be dismissed, mocked, or labeled dramatic.”
I trusted my airfield manager, but there was nothing he could do to stop how I was being treated. And I didn’t speak up — out of fear that I would be dismissed, mocked, or labeled dramatic.
Two men from the weather unit were also openly hostile. One told me he wanted to “hypnotize” me — a comment that deeply unsettled me, and asked on more than one occasion. The other would interrupt me in casual conversations and say loudly, “Did I ask you? No. Go make me a sandwich.” It was a very isolating six months. I fell into depression.
Retaliation in Uniform
My next duty station at the Air Force Academy made the previous two feel like a cakewalk. Both supervisors wrote me up multiple times — for not smiling. One even introduced me to the acronym HALT: “When you come into work, ask yourself — are you Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired?”
And yes — I was angry. And rightfully so.
Still, I tried to push through. I knew my value. I was a 5-star Airman. My performance, my awards, my record — all of it reflected someone committed to service. If I had the right leadership, I could’ve stayed the full 20 and made Chief. I know that in my heart.
But I didn’t have the right leadership. I had people who broke me down.
At the Air Force Academy, it got worse. I don’t speak to anyone from that shop now — maybe one or two. I can’t even drive by the airfield or the South Gate without a pit forming in my stomach.
At one point, I disclosed to leadership that I was receiving mental health support. I wasn’t ready to share the full story, but I needed space. Instead of support, I was met with anger. My first airfield manager at USAFA took it personally, accused me of not trusting him, verbally berated me, and even threw a pen across the room during the conversation.
Later, I was marked non-deployable due to a dog attack. A male coworker had to deploy in my place. He lashed out at me — publicly — yelling in front of the entire office. He made the workplace hostile and unsafe.
I raised concerns, but leadership told me to “let him feel his feelings” and to “stay out of his way.”
Pin it: A story of betrayal, survival, and finding strength after Military Sexual Trauma
This same man had access to my home address through the recall roster. I lived in fear he might show up — especially because he had previously been arrested for physically assaulting a woman, charges that were only dropped because the victim couldn’t remember the night. One of my male coworkers even expressed concern for my safety in private, telling me he was worried about the level of anger this man showed, and continued to show, toward me.
When a new airfield manager took over, he ignored everything and told us to “just get over it.” He forced me to work shifts alone with the same man I feared. He disregarded my safety completely. This hostility lasted for about a year. Meanwhile, after coming back from the deployment, that same man was awarded a medal for “sacrificing” to go in my place — and then received orders to England as a reward.
That same airfield manager even questioned why the women in our unit — including young female Airmen and a civilian — were hesitant to enter the fire department at our auxiliary airfield alone. That airfield was isolated — over an hour away from our main unit, with spotty cell service and bullet holes in the stop sign at the entrance. It didn’t feel safe. The women explained that walking into that building — a space clearly designed for and occupied by men — felt more like entering someone’s private dorm room than a shared workspace. But instead of listening or trying to understand, he brushed it off, saying, “Well, you just need to get over whatever you need to get over.”
That moment broke me — not because of what it meant for me, but because I knew firsthand what it feels like when a man in a leadership position dismisses a woman’s concerns about safety. I remembered what it did to me the first time it happened as a young Airman. I couldn’t stand by and watch my young female Airmen go through the same thing. So, I sent him an email — not to accuse anyone — but to explain why women take precautions in isolated environments. It wasn’t about blame. It was about awareness.
Later that night, I found out he’d read my email aloud, laughed, tore it up, and said, “I don’t care.” A week passed before I had to address him, because he would not address it himself. When I finally brought it up, he said, “Thanks for your contribution, but it’s not enough for me to fight for our own space out there.” He asked if anything had happened, and I said no. He replied, “You’re wrong for making assumptions about two men in the fire department.”
I was told about his behavior after the email by my young female troop, a month later. I reacted. I went to my mental health counselor and demanded to be removed from the office. I couldn’t take it anymore. I had reached my breaking point.
My commander got involved. The airfield manager was ordered to complete a month of Sexual Assault Awareness training. He requested to apologize to me, and I agreed — on the condition that my commander attend the meeting.
Good thing he did. There was no apology. Instead, the airfield manager used that moment to berate me again — in front of our commander. When the meeting ended, my commander apologized to me privately, out in the hallway.
But that was never the point.
The point is that women in uniform are forced to live in a constant state of risk assessment. Because when something does happen, we’re blamed. We’re doubted. We’re told to get over it.
And this doesn’t even begin to cover the sexual assaults and harassment I endured — experiences I never reported, because I saw how leadership had handled everything else.
My Breaking Point
After six months of retaliation from that airfield manager for standing up — and maybe I didn’t react in the “perfect” way — I broke. I had spent years trying to keep it together in a system that refused to protect or believe me.
That summer, I voluntarily admitted myself to outpatient treatment at a local mental health hospital. I needed help. I wanted to be better. I started trauma-focused therapy for MST, and I started writing Bootstrap Girl. Because writing it down was the only way I could begin to speak.
When I returned to work, the shop had moved on without me. Even the women I had tried to advocate for now avoided me and even talked openly about their disgust for me.
And all of this — everything I’ve shared — still doesn’t include the three sexual assaults I survived while in uniform.
How I Found My Voice
I don’t share this story for sympathy. I share it because there are countless others like me — still in the military, still in silence. I found my voice through writing. Bootstrap Girl became my outlet, my healing, and my way of reclaiming what was taken from me. I’m no longer afraid to be honest about what happened. If my story helps even one person feel less alone or more empowered to speak — then it was worth every word.
© 2025 Rhea Nocturne. Bootstrap Girl and all related content are part of an original work in progress. All rights reserved. This piece was written under the pen name Rhea Nocturne to protect the author’s privacy. The copyright is held under the author's legal name.
False Allegations of Sexual Assault, the Myth Protecting Military Sexual Trauma Predators
Department of Defense data shows false allegations of sexual assault in the military are rare, while retaliation against survivors is widespread.Department of Defense data shows false allegations of sexual assault in the military are rare, while retaliation against survivors is widespread. A recent article from Military Trial Defenders claims that false allegations of sexual assault are a "huge problem" in the military, citing that over seventy percent of military academy attendees believe this to be true.
How the military protects its image by making serbvice members believe the biggest threat is being falsely accused. The actual data shows they should worry about survivors suffering in silence.
Department of Defense data shows false allegations of sexual assault in the military are rare, while retaliation against survivors is widespread.Department of Defense data shows false allegations of sexual assault in the military are rare, while retaliation against survivors is widespread. A recent article from Military Trial Defenders claims that false allegations of sexual assault are a "huge problem" in the military, citing that over seventy percent of military academy attendees believe this to be true.
But how common are false allegations of sexual assault? Sexual assault statistics show the actual rate is between two and ten percent.
This statistics problem is a deliberate piece of disinformation that creates a perception that protects predators while destroying survivors.
I know because I lived through both the assault and the system that followed.
False Allegations Military Sexual Assault: Who Benefits From This Lie
When people believe false allegations of sexual assault are rampant instead of rare, predators win.
The perception builds on existing misogyny that women exaggerate for attention. So few sexual assault cases make it to trial because of this notion.
Predators understand the possibility for consequences is low. They commit crimes repeatedly and escalate severity because the system protects them.
Meanwhile, DoD data shows false complaints haven't exceeded three percent since 2014. In 2024, just one percent of reports were false.
Department of Defense data shows false allegations of sexual assault in the military are rare, while retaliation against victims is widespread.
UCMJ False Allegations: The Real Fear Survivors Face
The fear of reporting a sexual assault has more to do with only the assault itself.
Victims know their careers will likely be ruined for coming forward. They know they'll be retaliated against and called liars. Worst of all, they'll be completely ostracized by peers for not staying silent.
Survivors on my The Silenced Voices of MST describe experiencing compound trauma worse than the original assault.
When someone reports, they're ostracized while perpetrators are believed and comforted. Investigations focus on poking holes in victim statements. Living quarters get trashed, cars vandalized, work tools disappear.
The data confirms this reality: military personnel are twelve times more likely to experience retaliation than see their attacker convicted.
Burden of Proof in Sexual Assault Cases: The Conditioning Machine
Military academy attendees have been conditioned to see themselves as potential victims of false accusations rather than part of a system destroying real survivors.
The military protects its image by making service members believe the biggest threat is being falsely accused. The actual data shows they should worry about survivors suffering in silence.
This narrative serves institutional interests. It's easier to fear false allegations of sexual assault than confront sexual predators operating freely while survivors get psychologically tortured for speaking up. The burden of proof in sexual assault cases becomes weaponized against survivors rather than seeking truth.
Research shows 31 percent of men and 28 percent of women experienced retaliation after assault, whether they reported or not.
Evolutionary Accountability
Accountability ends military sexual violence.
We need to create an environment completely inhospitable to sexual violence and harassment. That means removing bystanders who witnessed harassment but did nothing. Removing supervisors, leaders, and commanders who allowed for an environment conducive to sexual violence.
When careers are destroyed and people realize they can't support their families because they protected predators, they won't tolerate it.
Accountability is a form of enforced adaptation. In basic training, when one person made a mistake, the whole unit paid the price through extra runs or pushups. That collective consequence changed behavior quickly because nobody wanted to carry the burden for someone else’s actions.
The same principle applies here. When offices are emptied and careers end for protecting predators, the perception shifts. People adapt their behavior when silence and complicity carry real consequences.
Department of Defense data shows false allegations of sexual assault in the military are rare, while retaliation against victims is widespread.
Many people never personally witness sexual violence, which makes it easy for myths to spread. But consistent, visible consequences create a new reality where protecting predators is no longer tolerated.
The Path Forward
After nine years of struggling with treatment-resistant depression from MST, I experienced a miracle. A civilian provider fought for me to get new medication that reduced every symptom in three days.
Coming back to life after nearly a decade made me realize I had to help other survivors reach that same place.
I started The Silenced Voices of MST podcast to let survivors know they're not alone and they are believed. Our voices lead to public recognition of Military Sexual Trauma's pervasiveness. We'll be returning with firsthand accounts of Military Sexual Trauma in just a few short weeks.
Public demand for accountability creates environmental change. Changed environments mean service members take those values home and create outward change.
The U.S. military has led American social change before. It integrated early. It paid women equally before most organizations.
Sexual violence can be the next thing we conquer together.
But only if we stop protecting the myth and start protecting survivors.
What will it take for your military community to prioritize survivor safety over institutional reputation? Share this article if you believe accountability saves lives.
Military Sexual Trauma and Sexual Harassment: Julie | The Silenced Voices of MST with Rachelle Smith
Former Air Force officer Julie shares her experience of sexual harassment, reporting, and resilience on The Silenced Voices of MST with Rachelle Smith.
Julie, a former U.S. Air Force officer, shares her story of Military Sexual Trauma, the harassment she endured, and the gaslighting that followed when she tried to report.
Julie, former Air Force officer, speaks about Military Sexual Trauma, sexual harassment, and the failures of the reporting process on The Silenced Voices of MST with Rachelle Smith.
Intro
In this episode of The Silenced Voices of MST, former Air Force officer Julie shares her experience of persistent sexual harassment during her military career and the challenges of speaking out against it. She recounts how inappropriate advances from older men became a pattern both in uniform and afterward as a civilian. One particular incident, occurring during pre-deployment training on the way to Afghanistan, escalated from unwanted touching at dinner to repeated harassment at multiple bars. Despite her initial reluctance to report, Julie recognized that her harasser was about to assume a leadership position overseeing hundreds of Airmen. She made the difficult decision to file a complaint to protect those under his authority.
Episode Summary
Her report set off a painful and disorienting process. Instead of support, she was assigned a Guard Jag who repeatedly pressured her to change her story. Even with witnesses corroborating her account and evidence of prior complaints against the perpetrator, Julie was treated as if she were lying. The investigation dragged on, and she endured months of gaslighting from officials who minimized her experience and questioned her integrity. She describes the psychological toll of this process, compounded by the stress of deployment to Afghanistan, where she faced a toxic command environment and constant anxiety.
Julie’s account highlights the structural failures that allow harassment and abuse to persist unchecked. She shares how her trust was eroded by leaders who ignored red flags and excused predatory behavior as long as the offender was “good at his job.” Despite this betrayal, she also points out the commanders and peers who did support her, and the Victim Advocate who ultimately helped shift her case toward accountability.
Her story extends beyond the incident itself into the lasting effects of trauma. She discusses how the experience left her with hypervigilance, difficulty trusting men, and ongoing struggles with dating. Therapy at the Stephen A. Cohen Military Family Clinic provided tools for managing anxiety, and writing became a vital outlet that led to publishing two books. She also describes how music, particularly Taylor Swift’s, gave her strength to keep fighting during the lowest points of her case.
Julie reflects on systemic change, noting her support for President Biden’s executive order that removed commanders from deciding sexual harassment cases. She acknowledges her frustration with false reporting, which undermines survivors’ credibility, but emphasizes the importance of stronger protections and unbiased processes. Her voice underscores how policy reform must be paired with cultural change if survivors are to find safety and justice.
Julie’s story is ultimately one of resilience. She turned her experience into advocacy, sharing her lessons with others considering military service and urging them to carefully weigh the personal costs. Her journey reminds listeners that even when silenced, survivors can carve out paths of truth, healing, and empowerment.
“I was made to feel like proving my integrity mattered more than proving he did something wrong.”
- Julie
Julie, a former Air Force officer, shares her experience of Military Sexual Trauma and sexual harassment, the gaslighting she endured when reporting, and how therapy and writing supported her recovery. Listen now.
Julie’s experience exposes the deep cracks in the military justice system, where investigations often focus more on discrediting survivors than holding perpetrators accountable. Her account makes clear how cultural rot and leadership failures sustain an environment where harassment thrives. Yet her decision to step forward was not only about her own dignity, it was about preventing future Airmen from being placed in the hands of a known predator. That choice embodies both courage and sacrifice.
Her story is also a reminder of the long shadow trauma casts. Even years after separation, the impact lingers in dating, trust, and daily interactions. But Julie’s resilience shines through her advocacy, her writing, and her willingness to keep speaking truth to power. For survivors listening, her message is both validation and hope. Even in the face of disbelief and institutional betrayal, healing is possible and change is worth fighting for.
Episode Trigger Warnings and Timestamps
08:00–09:12: Sexual harassment at a bar, unwanted touching, physical grabbing
09:13–12:40: Escalation of harassment, footsie, unwanted contact, inappropriate touching in public
12:41–13:50: Following behavior, waiting outside bathroom, intimidation
13:51–15:15: Reporting process, fear of reprisal, decision to come forward
15:16–19:29: Gaslighting by lawyer and investigators, repeated questioning, emotional distress
19:30–21:00: Anxiety, PTSD diagnosis, impact on daily life
29:42–30:37: Difficulty trusting men, ongoing effects on dating and relationships
Resources from this Episodes
If you’re currently working through the VA Disability claims process, download our free toolkit that helps you get the rating you deserve: Get access now
Julie's Books: The Myth of Adulting: Everyone's Just Winging It: https://a.co/d/3xVOEHw
Letters from Future Me: https://a.co/d/8UBQWFM
The Steven A. Cohen Military Family Clinic - https://www.endeavors.org/cohen-clinic-san-antonio/
Anxiety Guys - https://anxietyguys.com/
Join our mailing list to learn about upcoming episodes, new resources, and daily support.
Listen to the Full Coversation
Leave a Review
If this episode was meaningful to you, please leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Reviews help more people discover stories of Military Sexual Trauma and join the movement for change.
Next Episode
Our host, Rachelle Smith, speaks with Taylor, an Air Force dependent that shares the shock of trying to call Security Forces to report her assault, only to have her assailant answer the phone.
Support and Community
Veterans Crisis Line: Dial 988, then press
DoD Safe Helpline: https://www.sapr.mil/dod-safe-helpline
Facebook community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadvocatesofmst
VA Disability Toolkit: https://www.silencedvoicesmst.com/disability-toolkit
Contact Your Lawmaker Toolkit: https://www.silencedvoicesmst.com/contact-your-lawmaker-toolkit
About the Guest
Julie, a former Air Force officer, shares her experience of Military Sexual Trauma and sexual harassment, the gaslighting she endured when reporting, and how therapy and writing supported her recovery.
Internal Links
Army Veterans Needed for MST Research Study
When we heal to place of readiness to help people that are wearing the painful shoes we just shed, someone reaches out whose work feels deeply personal, urgent, and needed.
Erica Miller is one of those people. She’s a fellow MST survivor, an Army veteran, and a doctoral candidate at USC who is using her lived experience to push for real change. Her study is focused on the needs and voices of Army survivors who were assaulted while serving on active duty. If that’s your story, or someone you know, please take a moment to read and consider supporting her work.
“Truth is the basis of all healing.”
If you are a U.S. Army Veteran who experienced sexual assault while serving on active duty, your voice is urgently needed in a new research study led by a fellow survivor.
Erica Miller, a U.S. Army Veteran and doctoral candidate at the University of Southern California’s Rossier School of Education, is conducting a qualitative research project titled A Silent Epidemic: Exploring the Needs of Sexual Assault Survivors Who Served in the United States Army. Her study seeks to document the lived experiences of MST survivors and identify the recovery resources they needed but did not receive. The goal is to reshape how the Army addresses sexual assault reporting and survivor care by centering the voices of those directly impacted.
Erica is looking to connect with Army Veterans who meet the following criteria:
You must be 18 or older and have served on active duty in the U.S. Army.
You must have experienced military sexual trauma during that time.
Veterans of all genders and ranks are welcome.
Participation involves a virtual recorded interview via Zoom, lasting approximately 45 to 60 minutes, followed by a short email-based review of your transcript for accuracy. All identifying information will remain confidential, and participation is entirely voluntary. The study has received IRB approval through USC.
This project is survivor-led. Erica is not only a researcher, but also a FOIA analyst, Army veteran, and MST survivor herself. Her work aims to directly improve outcomes for other survivors by elevating their needs as the foundation for system change.
If you or someone you know may be interested in participating, or if you can help amplify this study to others in the Army MST survivor community, please reach out to Erica Miller directly at efmiller@usc.edu or by phone at (786) 765-2957.
Your story could help shape better policies, better support, and a more accountable military system for the next generation.
Military Sexual Trauma in Korea’s Drinking Culture and Trafficking: Lakeydra Houston (Part 2) | The Silenced Voices of MST with Rachelle Smith
Lakeydra Houston shares her story of Military Sexual Trauma in the U.S. Air Force, exposing alcohol culture in Korea, systemic betrayal, and survivor advocacy.
Lakeydra Houston shares her story of Military Sexual Trauma in the U.S. Air Force, exposing alcohol culture in Korea, systemic betrayal, and survivor advocacy.
U.S. Air Force veteran Lakeydra Houston discusses Military Sexual Trauma, alcohol culture in Korea, and her journey to advocacy on The Silenced Voices of MST .
Intro
U.S. Air Force veteran Lakeydra Houston shares her experience of Military Sexual Trauma while stationed in Korea, where a culture of heavy drinking and peer pressure created unsafe conditions for service members. She describes how trafficking operated inside the ranks, how leadership failed to act, and how systemic betrayal deepened her trauma. Despite these challenges, Lakeydra has become an advocate for survivors, emphasizing the need for accountability, support, and reform.
This is Part 2 of Lakeydra’s story. Read Part 1 here: https://www.silencedvoicesmst.com/blog/military-sexual-trauma-lakeydra-houston-part1
Episode Summary
In this continuation of her interview on The Silenced Voices of MST, Lakeydra Houston opens up about the ways Military Sexual Trauma shaped her service in the U.S. Air Force. Stationed in Korea, she encountered a drinking culture that normalized alcohol abuse and lowered safeguards for vulnerable service members. She explains how this environment not only increased the risk of assault but also protected perpetrators from accountability.
Lakeydra details multiple incidents of Military Sexual Trauma and the profound sense of betrayal she felt when leadership failed to act. Instead of receiving support, she faced retaliation, blame, and silence that compounded the harm. Her account also reveals the presence of trafficking networks inside the military, where power and authority were used to exploit and control.
Adding to this burden, Lakeydra experienced devastating personal loss with the death of her sister while she was still in service. The grief amplified her struggles with depression and suicidal thoughts, leaving her isolated in a culture unwilling to protect or support survivors.
U.S. Air Force veteran Lakeydra Houston discusses Military Sexual Trauma and alcohol culture in Korea on The Silenced Voices of MST with Rachelle Smith
Despite this, Lakeydra found strength in advocacy. By seeking therapy, connecting with survivor networks, and building community through groups like KeyFit and The Pink Berets, she began transforming her pain into purpose. Today, she speaks out about the connection between Military Sexual Trauma, toxic military culture, and systemic neglect, calling for urgent reform and trauma-informed care.
“You have to
remember your ‘why’.”
- Lakeydra Houston
This episode points out the intersection of Military Sexual Trauma, alcohol culture in Korea, trafficking within the Air Force, and the enduring fight for survivor justice.
Lakeydra’s experience is a rallying call to action. Her story exposes institutional betrayal, the hidden crisis of trafficking, and the devastating effects of unaddressed complex traumas. But take this to heart. Her story is an example of the almost miraculous healing power of support and community. Lakeydra’s journey shows that even in the darkest moments, there is still a dawn.
Episode Trigger Warnings and Timestamps
01:18–02:29: Alcohol abuse and toxic drinking culture
02:32–02:50: MST and military inaction
02:54–04:10: Peer pressure, bullying, isolation
04:23–05:39: Sexual assault, betrayal, victim blaming
05:42–06:18: Further assault, deepening trauma
06:25–07:23: Depression, reluctance to disclose
07:44–08:18: Human trafficking, leadership complicity
08:24–10:19: “Juicy Girls,” survivor guilt
11:02–14:10: Sister’s death, harassment, self-harm, suicidal thoughts
17:34–18:39: Supporting another MST victim, starting advocacy
19:31–20:34: Survivor silencing, victim blaming
26:08–26:43: Transition out of service, overdose mention, ongoing healingThis episode contains a few references to news articles and books that are listed below:
Resources from this Episodes
🔍 If you’re currently working through the VA Disability claims process, download our free toolkit that helps you get the rating you deserve: Get access now
Wounds to Wisdom: Healing Through Veteran and First Responder Narratives
Join our mailing list to learn about upcoming episodes, new resources, and daily support.
Listen to the Full Coversation
Leave a Review
If this episode was meaningful to you, please leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Reviews help more people discover stories of Military Sexual Trauma and join the movement for change.
Next Episode
Our host, Rachelle Smith, speaks with Gender Violence Institute founder, Chuck Derry, who offers insight into why Military Sexual Trauma has endured in the Armed Forces and exactly how to stop it.
Support and Community
Veterans Crisis Line: 988, then 1
SA Support for the DoD Community, contact the DoD Safe Helpline: https://www.sapr.mil/dod-safe-helpline
Join our Facebook community: The Advocates of MST
About the Guest
Lakeydra Houston is a U.S. Air Force veteran, survivor of Military Sexual Trauma, and advocate for reform. Through her work with organizations such as KeyFit and The Pink Berets, she supports fellow survivors and pushes for systemic change in how the military addresses sexual assault.
Internal Links
Military Sexual Trauma at Her First Duty Station: Lakeydra Houston (Part 1)
U.S. Air Force veteran Lakeydra Houston shares her story of Military Sexual Trauma at her first duty station, coping with alcohol, and mental health struggles.
U.S. Air Force veteran Lakeydra Houston shares her story of Military Sexual Trauma at her first duty station, where harassment escalated into assault. She explains how alcohol became a way to cope, how mental health struggles were ignored, and why survivor support is urgently needed.
U.S. Air Force veteran Lakeydra Houston shares her story of Military Sexual Trauma at her first duty station on The Silenced Voices of MST with Rachelle Smith.
Intro
U.S. Air Force veteran Lakeydra Houston shares how Military Sexual Trauma shaped her earliest years in service. After completing training and arriving at her first duty station, she faced harassment that escalated into assault. With few resources and no support, she turned to alcohol to cope. Her story reveals how retaliation, silence, and a lack of mental health care left survivors unprotected in the Air Force.
This is Part 1 of Lakeydra’s story. Read Part 2 here: www.silencedvoicesmst.com/blog/military-sexual-trauma-lakeydra-houston-part2
Episode Summary
She was reporting in, doing exactly what every new Airman does when they arrive at their first assignment. Lakeydra Houston recalls being groped by a first sergeant under the pretense of fixing her uniform. When she fled, another airman warned her not to report him because she had tried and was being discharged for it.
The men in her unit already knew the sergeant’s reputation. They laughed about it. Lakeydra was silenced, shamed, and pushed toward alcohol as her only way to cope. Surrounded by a toxic drinking culture and carrying a weapon every day, she unraveled emotionally while no one noticed and no one intervened.
The spiral deepened as Lakeydra entered a volatile relationship, became pregnant, and was deployed just six weeks after giving birth. She was neither physically nor emotionally ready. While serving in Dubai, harassment and violence continued. Some perpetrators were officers. Others were peers too scared or ashamed to report. Alcohol fueled the cycle until it was finally cut off, but by then the damage had spread. When Lakeydra received a call that her husband had been shot, she felt safer remaining overseas than returning home to a man she could not trust.
Pin this story to help amplify Lakeydra’s voice and story for survivors!
Her story exposes how toxic command climates and male-dominated cultures allow repeat offenders to thrive while silencing survivors. Systemic betrayal compounds personal trauma, trapping service members in a loop of silence, retaliation, and self-destruction.
“Going to the military was my way to start over and feel like I had a purpose in life.”
- Lakeydra
Click here to explore more survivor stories
If you’re still wondering if your pain “counts” or if you’re the only one, you’re not. Lakeydra hopes her courage helps other survivors understand they’re not alone, and that they can get out of the loop that they’re stuck in with support and help from advocates, trustworthy leadership, and mental health treatment and services.
Episode Trigger Warnings and Timestamps
01:36: Childhood sexual assault and drug use for coping
03:30–04:56: Discussion of September 11
07:36: Loss of sister
09:07: Loss of parent to gun violence
09:49–10:59: Harassment and sexual assault in technical school
11:26–22:39: Multiple assaults, childhood trauma, predatory leadership, peer complicity, self-blame, alcohol abuse, domestic violence, pregnancy, suicide, deployment after childbirth, family trauma cycles
23:02–29:11: Assaults on deployment tied to alcohol and abuse of power, reporting barriers due to rank, domestic violence, financial abuse, betrayal by spouse, ongoing trauma
Resources from This Episode
Free VA Disability Toolkit: https://www.silencedvoicesmst.com/disability-toolkit
Join our Facebook community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadvocatesofmst
Join our mailing list to learn about upcoming episodes, new resources, and daily support.
Listen to the Full Conversation
Leave a Review
If this episode was meaningful to you, please leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Reviews help more people discover stories of Military Sexual Trauma and join the movement for change.
Next Episode
Click here to read and watch Part 2 of Lakeydra’s story, where she discusses Military Sexual Trauma in Korea, the role of alcohol culture, trafficking inside the ranks, and her advocacy for survivors.
Support and Community
Veterans Crisis line: Dial 988, the press 1
DoD Safe Helpline: https://www.sapr.mil/dod-safe-helpline
About the Guest
Lakeydra Houston is a U.S. Air Force veteran, survivor of Military Sexual Trauma, and advocate for reform. She found the organization KeyFit and also works with The Pink Berets to support survivors and promote systemic change.
Internal Links
You are not alone. We believe you. You matter.
The Best Advice I Can Give For Surviving MST (MSTy’s Story | Part 3)
MSTy, an anonymous Marine Corps veteran, shares the second stage of struggles with mental health, learning about MST, and developing a tool to help survivors come forward and establish patterns of predatory behavior. This episode demonstrates the power of only one person saying, “No more!” and rallying more to stand with them against military sexual trauma and the military’s diligence in sweeping cases under the rug. Read the full story and access helpful resources.
MSTy shares her story of Military Sexual Trauma in the U.S. Air Force, reflecting on years of survival without support, the physical and emotional costs of unresolved trauma, and the role of books, pets, and community in her healing.
MSTy discusses Military Sexual Trauma, the health impacts of living in survival mode, and long-term healing on The Silenced Voices of MST with Rachelle Smith.
Books, Pets, and Daily Coping Tools
MSTy describes the long silence she endured before finding support. In those years, she turned to books as her lifeline, reading self-help, spiritual texts, and classics like Man’s Search for Meaning to find guidance. She explains how pugs became another coping tool, providing comfort, routine, and companionship. These simple daily practices gave her stability when nothing else was available.
She also reflects on how positive affirmations, gratitude, and even social media memes carried real weight. Short reminders like “you are enough” or “what happened to you is not who you are” gave her perspective in moments when she felt overwhelmed. She emphasizes how easy it is to dismiss small acts of encouragement, but for survivors they can become anchors in the darkest times.
Beyond coping, MSTy talks about building community. Through her MST Crime Map, she gave survivors a way to mark their experiences anonymously and establish patterns of predatory behavior across military history. She also created pages like MST News and Info and Misty Days on Facebook and Instagram to curate resources, share daily reflections, and remind survivors they are not alone.
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After finding out the long-term cost of unaddressed trauma, MSTy offers caution to survivors. She discusses chronic muscle tightness, inflammation, and memory issues that worsened over time. She regrets how dissociation and survival mode prevented her from being fully present with her children when they were young. Looking back, she warns that waiting decades to begin healing comes at a heavy price.
“Make time for it today.” - — MSTy
The People Who Stayed
Still, MSTy highlights the people who stayed. A best friend in the military, a civilian coworker, and her husband all saw her worth even when she doubted it. Her husband’s reassurance, “I ain’t scared,” became a defining reminder that she could be loved without fear or judgment.
Click here to explore more survivor stories
MSTy’s story shows how coping strategies, community, and small acts of daily healing can sustain survivors.
If you are unsure if you are ready to seek help, remember MSTy’s message of urgency for prioritizing emotional wellness before the physical and emotional toll becomes irreversible.
Episode Trigger Warnings and Timestamps
00:14–00:31: On-screen details of MST markers
01:26–01:33: Panic attacks, dissociation
11:25–14:22: Physical toll of trauma, regret, difficulty being emotionally present
Resources From This Episode:
This episode contains a few references to news articles and books that are listed below:
MSTy’s MST Crime Map: https://mstmap.com/
MST News & Info: https://www.facebook.com/MST.Information
Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl
The Power of Positive Thinking by Dr. Norman Vincent Peale
The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself by Michael Alan Singer
Support the Mission
The Silenced Voices of MST needs your help. Donate today to help us continue to share these stories and demand accountability.
Join our mailing list to learn about upcoming episodes, new resources, and daily support.
Join the Conversation & Amplify Survivors
Leave a Review
If this episode was meaningful to you, please leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Reviews help more people discover stories of Military Sexual Trauma and join the movement for change.
Support and Community:
Veterans Crisis line: Dial 988, the press 1
DoD Safe Helpline: https://www.sapr.mil/dod-safe-helpline
Join our Facebook community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadvocatesofmst
Internal Links
If Victims Were Afraid Then, Predators Should Worry Now (MSTy’s Story | Part 2)
MSTy, an anonymous Marine Corps veteran, shares the second stage of struggles with mental health, learning about MST, and developing a tool to help survivors come forward and establish patterns of predatory behavior. This episode demonstrates the power of only one person saying, “No more!” and rallying more to stand with them against military sexual trauma and the military’s diligence in sweeping cases under the rug. Read the full story and access helpful resources.
How MSTy designed a new tool that helps survivors track abuse, expose patterns, and take back their power — one marker at a time.
Survivors can take their power back with this map — and that includes you.
Accountability Through Reported Patterns of Predatory Behavior
MSTy didn’t set out to become the creator of an innovative and accurate way to hold the perpetrators of Military Sexual Trauma accountable. Like many survivors, she was mostly trying to get through the aftermath of her encounters with avoidance and unhealthy coping until she found education and therapy. Survivors can especially understand wanting to only seek peace after having their lives disturbed so violently and abruptly, often without support for many years until that became unbearable as well.
In learning about complex PTSD and dissociation as a coping skill, she understood that silence and pretending her traumatic events hadn’t happened wouldn’t make the events magically disappear. It didn’t make it easier, because her trauma appeared in her life in other ways when she least expected or wanted it to.
In Part 2, MSTy shares what happened after her assaults — the disorientation, the dissociation, and the dark spiral that followed. But this time, she’s guiding listeners along her path to healing and discovering a brilliant method to help more survivors speak up. She’s sharing her way, possibly your way, of fighting back against this toxic cultural issue in our military.
MSTy introduces a powerful data driven crime map, born from her own story: a digital map that plots MST incidents across the world — Every marker represents a survivor. Every marker is a story that someone felt they had to keep quiet. Until now.
Finally Understanding She Wasn’t Alone
After MSTy’s terrifying and confusing assaults and harassment, she began documenting what happened — first in her diary, then in her mind, and eventually in a way that others could connect with too.
She speaks about living in a fog of dissociation, turning to alcohol, and losing trust in everything and everyone around her — including herself. But slowly, over time, something shifted. She courageously chose to go back to serving, in the Air Force after September 11th. This new direction with better peers, more opportunities to be the servicemember she knew she could be, and to be able to guide younger Airmen was a source of peace and redemption. A second chance. And upon retiring from both military and civilian work, she turned her focus to healing from MST. The more she learned about MST, the more she realized how common this was — and how often it was expertly covered up, completely ignored, or viciously downplayed.
That’s when the idea for the MST Map found its way.
Using Patterns to Isolate Predators
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The MST Map isn’t just about stories — it’s about patterns. As MSTy began collecting survivor submissions, she saw its potential. Imagine if we could isolate the similarities: the same bases, the same patterns. Different people. Different years. But the same violence.
Consider this. As an example, let’s say a certain recruiter was stationed in an area for 4 years and there are numerous cases of MST reported on the map in that specific time period, and the person was described the same way by all victims… by process of elimination, this map makes it possible to finally validate a victim’s pain.
She and Rachelle discuss how documenting these stories can visually give survivors a sense of power and justice. Most markers are anonymous, while others contain comments of what happened in more detail. But all of them say the same thing: This is real. And it’s everywhere.
The more markers, the better the opportunity to zero in on the people that caused so much pain but managed to slip by, protected by their leadership often to the serious detriment to the lives destroyed in their wake.
Demonstrating the Magnitude of MST
MSTy opens up about how watching the shock toward and spread of Vanessa Guillén’s story pushed her into action. She talks about the exhaustion of fighting the VA disability claim system while still wrestling your own shame. The pain of being invalidated online. The rage of watching predators get promoted or thriving while survivors are barely staying alive each day.
And the hope that something like the map might finally turn anecdote into evidence. Patterns into pain. Well-kept secrets into cleansing truth.
“This map isn’t just data. It’s how we get change, accountability.” - MSTy
Every marker is a defining moment that someone chose to speak up.
By the end of the episode, MSTy reflects on what it means to keep going — to build something for others even when the process hurts. She and Rachelle talk about accountability, prevention, and the fact that every survivor who shares their story makes it a little harder for systems to pretend they don’t know.
This isn’t just a tool. This is a reason for perpetrators to finally begin to feel the same fear that every survivor has felt daily since their lives were changed forever.
Links From This Episode:
This episode contains a few references to news articles and books that are listed below:
Join our mailing list to learn about upcoming episodes, new resources, and daily support.
Episode Trigger Warning Index
This episode contains references to the following topics. Please use this guide to skip if needed:
12:54 - Mention of Vanessa Guillén
13:06 - Mentions of dissociation/mental health struggle
13:22 - Compensation and Pay Exam
13:45 - Mentions of Complex PTSD/mental health struggle
15:10 - Explanation of MST Map Website
15:31 - All types of SA named
15:50 - Mention of MST victims of recruiters
16:22 - Marine Corps recruiter predator news article
16:41 - Army ROTC LT COL predator news article discussed
17:16 - 17: 45 - Unreported cases of MST
17:49 - 18:29 - Markers displayed on the map of incidents
20:02 - 22:08 Trolls invalidating MST on social media
22:24 - 22:36 - Feelings of shame, isolation, and paranoia
23:11 - 24:47 - Describes how MST occurs around the world and in different situations illustrated by map markers can identify perpetrators over time
Takeaways from This Conversation
Creating a map for MST allows survivors to share their stories anonymously and still establish patterns of predatory behavior.
Personal healing often involves confronting past traumas.
Predators often look for naive, trusting individuals with weak boundaries.
Dissociation can be a coping mechanism for trauma survivors.
Data mapping can help identify patterns of abuse and accountability.
Survivors often feel isolated for years due to shame and stigma.
Accountability is crucial for creating change in the military.
Reflection Journal Prompt
What would accountability look like if survivors led the conversation?
Spend a few minutes after listening to reflect or journal. What did you feel during this episode? What are you still thinking about? What systems need to change — and what part could you play in that change?
Join the Conversation & Amplify Survivors
Want to talk through your experience? Or support someone else in theirs?
Join our private Facebook group: The Advocates of MST
Don’t forget. This conversation matters. And MSTy showed immense courage by telling her story. Please help us make sure her voice travels further: Leaving a written review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts helps elevate the visibility of the show for more survivors suffering in isolation and pain. A simple review can change another person’s life forever.
Leave a review on Apple Podcasts
Need Support?
Although this podcast is a great resource, it does not and should not replace care from a medical professional. If you’re in crisis or need someone to talk to:
Call the Veterans Crisis Line — 988, then press 1
Or go to the nearest emergency room.
You are not alone. We believe you. You matter.
The final part in MSTy’s three part series goes live Tuesday April 15, 2025.
BIG VOICE MST | Podcast News Update - March 14
Stay informed on MST-related news, survivor stories, and resources. This week's updates cover new legislation, global MST stories, and recovery from PTSD.
Howdy Madvocates,
A quick reminder that the final part of Brian’s episode is streaming now wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube. I highly recommend to watch or listen if you are struggling while trying to advocate for yourself in health care or trying to get your discharge changed, because this episode has the lessons that Brian has learned from fighting for justice for two decades and what his healthy coping strategies are, . If you have trouble with falling asleep because of anxiety or PTSD, this is the episode for you.
Now on to The BIG VOICE.
Let’s get into the latest Military Sexual Trauma-related news, new MST legislation that affects the MST community, and resources designed to support survivors and advocates like you. I urge practicing self-care while browsing some of these stories, there are trigger warnings for content that may be upsetting. There are also positive stories of recovery and MST survivor resources as well, I didn’t want this to be “doom and gloom’ as if change is not possible.
Change is possible, especially if we stay informed and stay vigilant.
As you know, this problem is not a rare occurrence—there’s a global MST crisis that demands accountability, justice, and care for survivors. The stories from around the world showcase this problem, but it’s a small snowflake on an otherwise huge iceberg of pain, shame, and anger this issue causes. And it’s never one person affected by an assault or harassment. Entire communities feel the ripple effects of this issue, even if they don’t realize it.
Whether you’re here to stay informed, take action, or find resources for yourself or a loved one, this is your space to connect, learn, and advocate for change. Need support? Come find our group on Facebook: The Advocates of MST. We’re here to listen, share, uplift, and create an environment of acceptance without gender restrictions.
If you or someone you know is struggling with MST-related PTSD, depression, or suicidal thoughts, please know that help is available. The Veterans Crisis Line is open 24/7—dial 988 and press 1 for confidential support.
New Jersey bill looks to give easier access to mental health drugs
WPIX-TV (U.S. MST related-legislation)
By Jim Vasil
TRENTON, N.J. (PIX11) — When Krystal Cordero came home from an operation enduring freedom, PTSD followed her along with Military Sexual Trauma, or MST.
“They truly don’t set you up for the violence that you see, the aftermath, the feeling of loneliness, the feeling when you transition out that you no longer have somebody to really talk to,” said Cordero, an Army veteran of Totowa. “I unfortunately had an officer who tried to take advantage of me. He did not succeed but nonetheless, I had to suffer the assault.”
For years after coming home, she endured what many veterans have experienced: having to jump through hoops to get the prescription meds to treat their condition — hoops like step therapy or needing prior authorization.
“It’s almost like you’re dangling a treat in front of them and you’re saying, ‘almost there,’ but not there yet,” said Cordero. “We’re tired of chasing things. We need to be heard.”
Next week in Trenton, lawmakers will discuss a bill that will make it easier for patients with serious mental illnesses like PTSD, schizophrenia, bipolar disorders, and others to get the medicine they need – by requiring prescription drug coverage without prior authorization, or step therapy, a method of having patients try a less expensive drug first.
Read the article here: https://pix11.com/news/local-news/new-jersey/new-jersey-bill-looks-to-give-easier-access-to-mental-health-drugs/
Impending Legislation Senate Veterans Affairs Committee
Veterans of Foreign Wars (U.S. MST -related legislation)
Statement by Pat Murray
Draft legislation, Servicemembers and Veterans Empowerment and Support Act
The VFW supports this legislation, particularly its overarching theme of enhanced training for claim processors and reviewers that emphasizes accuracy, completeness, and improved communications throughout the disability claims process. This aspect of the bill is especially compelling by seeking to increase the proficiency of claims processors in recognizing nuanced non-military sources of evidence, eliciting vital information without retraumatizing the survivor, and in correctly processing claims involving military sexual trauma (MST). The annual focused reviews should validate (or refute) the effectiveness of the training. Emphasizing their importance, these reviews will continue until claim processors for MST-related claims achieve a 95 percent accuracy rate for five consecutive years. Additionally, the VFW concurs with VA’s aggressive outreach campaign pertaining to various facets of MST reporting and claim adjudication. However, we doubt VA’s ability to achieve its laudable goal of providing MST claims information to disenrolled service academy students from the last 80 years unless Congress substantially resources VA for this purpose. Lastly, the VFW concurs with VA’s updated definition of MST that includes trauma involving online or other technological communications
See the draft legislation here: https://www.vfw.org/advocacy/national-legislative-service/congressional-testimony/2025/3/pending-legislation-svac
Defence Force sexual assault prevention team's future uncertain
Radio New Zealand (New Zealand MST News)
By Rachel Helyer Donaldson
The Defence Force insists it remains committed to preventing harmful sexual behaviour in its ranks, despite putting its entire Sexual Assault Prevention Response Advisor (SAPRA) team on notice.
It is understood that the team, who were brought in as part of an action plan to eliminate inappropriate sexual behaviour, were told last week that they could be made redundant, following a consultation period.
An NZDF spokesperson confirmed the Defence Force would be starting a consultation process with staff and unions on "proposals for change across its civilian workforce" from Thursday, 20 March.
Read the article here: https://www.rnz.co.nz/news/national/544938/defence-force-sexual-assault-prevention-team-s-future-uncertain
Trump, Hollywood, and How We Fail Latinas in the Military
LatinaMedia.co
By Denise Zubizarreta (U.S. MST News)
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As a Navy veteran, I know firsthand what it’s like to serve in a system that doesn’t always see you, protect you, or uplift you. I’ve seen how Latinas in the military have to work twice as hard to get half the recognition. So when I saw that Trump fired Admiral Linda Fagan, the first woman to ever lead a branch of the U.S. military, I knew exactly what that meant.
This wasn’t just a political move. This was a message. And if we don’t take that message seriously, we’re in trouble.
The U.S. military has never been an easy place for women, especially Latinas. We’ve been here since World War II, shoved into support roles, denied leadership opportunities, and left out of the history books. The military loves to use our labor – but when it comes to promotions, recognition, or safety? We’re an afterthought.
We know the stats: Latinas are overrepresented in lower ranks and underrepresented in leadership. We’re more likely to face sexual harassment and discrimination (unfortunately, they removed the study on the DOD website delineating this!). We’re less likely to be promoted compared to our white male counterparts. And now? With federal DEI programs being gutted, the little progress we’ve made is about to disappear.
Read the article here: https://latinamedia.co/latinas-in-the-military/
One veteran’s path to healing from trauma
Department of Veterans Affairs - Audacy (U.S. MST News)
Army veteran Candace Decker describes herself as “being in a very dark place” before she connected with Pacific Islands VA.
She had experienced military sexual trauma while she was active duty and even after she left the Army, she continued to have night terrors and other issues.
At first, she didn’t think VA had programs that she would find helpful.
“I connected with the iVET Post Traumatic Stress Disorder Program first. They helped me to connect with other programs that could get me help that I needed,” she said.
When Decker first connected with the VA, she had terrible problems with her digestive tract from eating things that she didn’t realize were causing inflammation and from taking pills for pain. With the help of VA doctors, she was able to change her diet. She was also able to discover triggers for her headaches.
Read the article: https://www.audacy.com/connectingvets/get-help/mental-health/one-veterans-path-to-healing-from-trauma
PGA Tour player Billy Horschel visits with Panama City Beach veteran and service dog
PanamaCity News Herald (U.S. MST News)
By DeonTay Smith
On Wednesday, eight-time PGA Tour winner Billy Horschel surprised a Panama City Beach Air Force veteran, Joey Pate, and his K9s For Warriors service dog, Roscoe, at The Players Championship in Ponte Vedra Beach.
Horschel and the Horschel Family Foundation are helping K9s For Warriors raise awareness of veterans suffering from PTSD, traumatic brain injury and/or military sexual trauma.
According to a press release, the Horschel Family Foundation sponsored Roscoe’s service dog training in 2024, and the pair graduated from K9s For Warriors in November.
On average, 20 veterans a day take their own lives. K9s for Warriors is determined to end veteran suicide by providing trained service dogs to veterans.
Pate and Roscoe have been paired for nearly five months.
Read the article here: https://www.newsherald.com/story/news/local/2025/03/13/panama-city-beach-florida-veteran-helped-by-pga-tours-billy-horschel/82372724007/
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Sen. Moran Urges GAO to Investigate Ways to Support VA Employees Responsible for Processing Military Sexual Trauma Claims
U.S. Senate Committee on Veterans Affairs (U.S. MST-related legislation)
WASHINGTON – U.S. Senator Jerry Moran (R-Kan.) – chairman of the Senate Committee on Veterans’ Affairs – called on the Government Accountability Office (GAO) to investigate how the Department of Veterans Affairs can better train and support employees responsible for processing disability compensation claims for veterans who have experienced military sexual trauma (MST).
To improve the timeliness of processing MST claims, the Veterans Benefits Administration (VBA) initially created specialized teams of employees in each VBA regional office. However, in 2022, VA consolidated all MST claims processing to the regional office in San Juan, Puerto Rico, while dedicating “surge sites” at other regional offices, as needed, to meet increased workload demands for MST claims.
Recent committee oversight has identified concerns regarding insufficient training and a lack of support for the VBA employees in San Juan and the surge sites – many of whom are veterans themselves – responsible for processing MST claims.
Read the press release: https://www.veterans.senate.gov/2025/3/sen-moran-urges-gao-to-investigate-ways-to-support-va-employees-responsible-for-processing-military-sexual-trauma-claims
Keep Marching Forward: The ongoing battle for women veterans
The Big Smoke (Australia MST News)
By Llani “LJ” Kennealy
Last Saturday was International Women’s Day—a day which consistently reminds us that progress is not inevitable. It is fought for, step by step, voice by voice.
The theme for 2025, Keep Marching Forward, especially resonated deeply for women veterans, who continue to push for equity, respect, and systemic change in the wake of the Royal Commission into Defence and Veteran Suicide.
The commission has exposed long-standing cultural and structural barriers that have disproportionately affected women in service. Now, more than ever, we must ensure that this results in meaningful reform, not just rhetoric. The fight for women veterans’ rights is ongoing, and it is one for which we must continue to march forward in unison.
The findings of the Royal Commission have once again exposed deeply-rooted issues, including gender-based discrimination, alarming levels of sexual trauma, and lack of career progression. These systemic challenges (including holding to account perpetrators of unacceptable behaviour) have contributed to poor mental health outcomes for many women in Defence.
Read the article here: https://thebigsmoke.com.au/2025/03/14/keep-marching-forward-the-ongoing-battle-for-women-veterans/
More sexual abuse complaints filed against Coast Guard, service now faces $290M in claims
Stars & Stripes (U.S. MST News)
By Gary Warner
🔔 (trigger warning, graphic details of assaults in article)🔔
Seven more former U.S. Coast Guard cadets filed claims that they were victims of sexual abuse at the service’s academy, the latest round of complaints tied to the Fouled Anchor scandal.
The Coast Guard now faces $290 million in claims from the sexual assault scandal at its academy in New London, Conn. The administrative complaints were filed Thursday under the Federal Tort Claims Act, the first legal step in initiating a civil lawsuit against the federal government.
The new filings bring the total to 29 cadets and prospective cadets who have filed complaints, according to Christine Dunn, an attorney with the Washington, D.C., law firm Sanford Heisler Sharp McKnight, which is representing the cadets.
The legal complaints follow a year of scrutiny for the U.S. Coast Guard Academy that began with the revelation that the service concealed a report that found academy officials had routinely mishandled reports of sexual assault among cadets. The report, known as Operation Fouled Anchor, was the result of a six-year internal review of 102 reports of sexual assault and harassment cases at the academy between 1990 and 2006.
Read the article here: https://www.stripes.com/branches/coast_guard/2025-03-13/coast-guard-sexual-assault-fouled-anchor-17131851.html
Army women reveal abuse as former minister admits 'colossal failure'
SkyNews (U.K. MST News)
By Becky Johnson, social affairs correspondent, Rebecca Spencer, specialist producer
Warning: This article contains material some readers may find distressing
Jane* served in the British Army for almost 20 years. It was a career she loved and excelled in, rising through the ranks. But then, she says, it ended when a colleague r*ped her.
She breaks down as she recalls the night out, almost six years ago.
Jane reported the attack to the Royal Military Police but days later was called into a meeting with officers in her chain of command and accused of flirting with men and drinking too much. Later, she discovered messages they had exchanged calling her a whore.
The military police investigated, but the case never made it to court martial, where military trials are heard - she was told there was an unrealistic chance of conviction.
Her case formed part of a legal process to try to force the previous government to transfer rape investigations in the armed forces to civilian courts, but the change was voted down in parliament.
Now, a high-profile former defence minister, and veteran, who failed to back the move has admitted he got it wrong.
Read the article here: https://news.sky.com/story/army-women-reveal-abuse-as-former-minister-admits-colossal-failure-13325673
Fort Cavazos warrant officer charged with sexual assault of a child, domestic abuse
Killeen Daily Herald (U.S. MST News)
By Brent Johnson
🔔 (trigger warning, graphic details in article’s
description of charge sheet and victims’ injuries)🔔
A soldier assigned to Fort Cavazos was arraigned in a post courtroom last week on charges of physically abusing his wife and children, sexually assaulting a child, disobeying a lawful order by a superior officer and obstruction of justice.
Warrant Officer 1 Jonathan Mateo, an officer with 1st Cavalry Division, is accused of a string of offenses against family members dating back to mid-2018, according to a redacted charge sheet released by the Army Office of Special Trial Counsel. The alleged incidents took place both at Fort Cavazos and Fort Huachaca, a small Army post in southern Arizona.
Read the article here: https://kdhnews.com/military/fort-cavazos-warrant-officer-charged-with-sexual-assault-of-a-child-domestic-abuse/article_4d68253a-0071-11f0-ad76-8f5124c7dbd0.html
Rachelle’s Take: Personally, I’m elated to see the legislation out there to improve the quailty of life for veterans who have been through so much turmoil trying to navigate lief after MST. There is hope and beauty in knowing that many of us are out here, fighting and advocating for complete strangers, because we are bonded by service and the pain caused by it.
How can we advocate for these changes together?
Leave a comment below with your ideas!
Yes, these stories are difficult to read, but MST survivors know that it’s even more painful to live in then re-live for the rest of our lives. MST is a crisis that affects service members and veterans across the globe, and the best way to demand change is by refusing to stay silent and call for accountability. Too many have been forced to endure their pain in isolation and shame.
Survivors deserve justice, accountability, and relentless support—not just in the United States, but worldwide.
Also, before we go, I wanted to share that we have a new playlist on YouTube! It’s called “The MSTea” because I’ll be spilling the tea with breakdowns of previous high visibility MST scandals, analysis of current legislation and yes, even politics, because they affect us. If you’re not subscribed to our YouTube channel, click here. Why I’m excited about this: As a Public Affairs officer, I never got to be snarky or sarcastic and point out the obvious hypocrisy of many actions taken that were supposedly supposed to support our military or veteran community. Now, the gloves are off.
Surviving Assault Secrets: The Stunning Repercussions For Men That Speak Up (Part 3)
Brian, a Marine Corps veteran, shares the next part of his journey from Marine to civilian in this episode. Explore the lasting impacts of military sexual trauma, PTSD, and the urgent need for support for male survivors. Read the full story and access helpful resources.
USMC veteran, Brian, shares his story in the latest episode of The Silenced Voices of MST
In the final part of this series, Brian, a Marine Corps veteran, gives us the meat and potatoes of managing PTSD, sleep, and intrusive thoughts. He credits much of his growth to guided meditations and continuously searching out new and different types of coping strategies that help him regain his power.
Brian's New Outlook on Life and Coping
Continuing his story from Part 2, Brian describes importance of meditation, finding the right therapist, and using storytelling as a tool for recovery. He also discusses the toxic culture within the military and why systemic change is necessary to protect future service members:
Trying to receive help
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Brian explains how sleep meditation and hypnosis techniques helped him process his trauma and find a sense of calm amid the chaos. Apps like Headspace are beneficial to those who have difficulty with insomnia due to anxiety, PTSD, and intrusive thoughts that can make it next to impossible to fall or stay asleep.
Like many survivors, Brian faced roadblocks within the military and VA system when seeking acknowledgment and assistance. He discusses how victim-blaming and also having mental health providers give up on him several times made it even harder for him to make progress. But he does stress that if you need help, keep trying. You will find someone that you mesh with, it takes time with different personalities to work together and build trust and rapport in therapy.
Toxic Military Culture & Systemic Failures
Brian and Rachelle discuss how harassment, abuse, and leadership failures create a culture where MST continues to happen unchecked. Although many members of the military are ready to ignore or outright deny the experiences of lives touched by MST, it doesn’t change reality. MST is a problem, and will continue to be until we address it as a systemic issue that is deeply ingrained in military culture. Brian shares why he decided to go public with his story, despite the stigma and backlash survivors often face. He explains how telling his truth helped him reclaim his power and encourage others to do the same.
Brian urges fellow survivors to seek help, share their stories, and find community in advocacy.
Click here to explore more survivors stories.
"Holding onto trauma is like a disease—it eats away at you.”
Key Takeaways:
Meditation can be a powerful healing tool for MST survivors.
Speaking out about trauma can be liberating and empowering.
The military must enact systemic changes to support MST survivors.
Finding the right therapist is crucial—don’t stop searching until you find one that fits.
Every survivor’s story matters, and sharing it can help others heal.
Don’t forget to subscribe to our YouTube channel!
Join our mailing list to learn about upcoming episodes, new resources, and daily support.
Resources:
Visit Brian’s Website: 8Bmedia.com
Read More: GQ Article on Male Rape in the Military
Need help processing or want to share your story? Join our supportive community on Facebook: The Advocates of MST
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-HOPE (4673)
Michael Sealey’s Guided Meditations: YouTube Channel
Cal Melkez’s Sleep Meditations: YouTube Channel
If you are in crisis or need immediate support, call the Veterans Crisis Line: 988, then 1
If this episode resonates with you, please share it, comment your thoughts, and leave a review to help amplify survivor voices. Together, we can change the conversation around MST and push for meaningful reform.
🎧 Full Episode Available on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/silencedvoicesmst
Part 1 of MSTy’s story will release on March 18, 2025.
BIG VOICE MST | Podcast News Update - March 7
Hi Madvocates, we’re back with more news about MST and our community of victims, advocates, and survivors.
Hey Madvocates,
We went viral!
I decided to share my story of overcoming Military Sexual Trauma and how that led to working at James A. Haley Veterans’ Hospital on YouTube. Within hours, the video exploded in views, subscribers, and comments. And that means so much more visibility to our community and its mission. And yes, I did lose my job because of DOGE, but the blessing that came out of it was finding so many resources that the VA and many nonprofits offer globally. Setbacks are also opportunities if you change the way you think about them. Oddly enough, the story from episode 11 where Maggie and I share our nightmare from DeBakey VAMC put me on the path to this show and to you!
Now on to The BIG VOICE.
Here’s the reality. The stories in this post may be difficult to read if you are a survvivor of MST. If you have experienced MST or are triggered by discussions of sexual assault in the military, please prioritize your well-being. However, it’s so important that we continue exposing these issues because they are not rare—it happens far too often in our armed forces, veterans' communities, and military installations worldwide.
These are not isolated events. Reports of sexual assault in the military continue to rise, with service members and veterans often facing retaliation, lack of justice, and long-term trauma. While many of the headlines focus on incidents in the U.S. military, this is not just an American issue—military sexual trauma is a global crisis. Service members from Canada, the UK, Australia, and beyond have also come forward with their experiences, and some of the articles in our BIG VOICE posts will reflect that as they make the news.
We must demand accountability, stronger protections, and real change within the Department of Defense, VA support systems, and international military organizations. No matter where it happens, MST survivors deserve justice, support, and a culture that refuses to tolerate abuse.
If you or someone you know is struggling with MST-related PTSD, depression, or suicidal thoughts, please reach out. The Veterans Crisis Line is available 24/7—just dial 988, then press 1 for confidential support. You are not alone, and your voice matters.
Read the article here: https://mainemorningstar.com/2025/03/06/maine-lawmakers-look-to-shore-up-supports-for-survivors-of-military-sexual-trauma/
Maine lawmakers look to shore up supports for survivors of military sexual trauma
Maine Morning Star
By Emma Davis
Lawmakers on both sides of the aisle urged the Veterans and Legal Affairs Committee to provide funding to increase services for both active duty military and veterans who are survivors of sexual assault and harassment.
The Legislature approved one of these measures last session, which aims to fund military sexual trauma liaisons, however end-of-session procedural scuffles resulted in it ultimately failing to become law.
Rep. Morgan Rielly (D-Westbrook) re-introduced that initiative this session, along with another bill aimed at lowering barriers for survivors who already have a military protective order and are seeking the additional protections available through Maine’s courts.
While there was no opposition during Wednesday’s public hearing on the renewed push for liaisons, the plan to streamline Maine courts’ abilities to consider military protection orders when ruling on abuse or harassment cases was opposed by the state’s judicial branch, representatives of which argued the change would negatively interfere with a defendant’s due process rights.
VA’s latest report shows veterans suicide remains a national epidemic
ROI-NJ
By Ray Zardetto
The latest report by the Department of Veterans Affairs about veteran suicide is a mixed bag of progress and setbacks, but the report’s bottom line is that the suicide rate for veterans remains at epidemic levels nationally.
The 2024 National Veterans Suicide Prevention Report was released in December and covers the years 2021-22. The report provides the most recent trend data and recommends seven focus areas critical to combatting veteran suicide.
According to the report, in 2022, there were 6,407 suicides among veterans, an average of 17.5 suicides every day.
Those at the forefront of fighting veteran suicide in New Jersey believe the estimate is low because it is difficult to account for all veterans.
Read the article here: https://www.roi-nj.com/2025/02/26/industry/military/vas-latest-report-shows-veterans-suicide-remains-a-national-epidemic/
Military leaders have failed to create inclusive culture for women, time for accountability
Forces News
Former Royal Navy Commodore Steve Prest
The coroner's inquest into the death of Gunner Jaysely Beck concluded on 20 February, with him determining she took her own life.
Failings and breaches of its own policies in the Army's handling of a previous sexual assault upon her had made her reluctant to report her later line manager when he then subjected her to sustained harassment, leading to her suicide.
This tragic case, and the airing of the details in public, have led to many currently serving personnel and veterans sharing their own stories of harassment and sexual assault at the hands of their colleagues via Fill Your Boots (@militarybanter), a social media account run by a paratrooper veteran called Alfie Usher.
Read the article: https://www.psychologytoday.com/sg/blog/invisible-chains/202502/soldiers-who-are-domestic-violence-victims
Jaysley Beck is not alone. We’ve found systemic sexual abuse in UK military
openDemocracy
By Ethan Shone and Cian Norris
The details that emerged from Jaysley Beck’s inquest last week were truly horrifying. But for our journalists, who have spent much of the past year investigating the extent of sexual abuse in the British military, they were sadly not surprising.
Nineteen-year-old Beck took her own life in her room at Larkhill Barracks on 15 December 2021. A coroner has now ruled that the army’s handling of her complaint about a serious sexual assault played “more than a minimal contributory part in her death”.
Among the disturbing findings we have made in the past year was the fact that a quarter of cases heard in the military courts since 2018 related to sexual offences, with 77% of men tried for rape in court martials found not guilty – compared to around 30% in civilian courts.
We have also exposed how hundreds of men have been sexually abused while serving, and how the armed forces are failing to enforce their zero-tolerance policy designed to prevent sexual abuse abroad. And we told the story of Jessica, who faced a 22-year fight for justice after being abused as a child growing up on a British Army base.
Read the article: https://www.opendemocracy.net/en/jaysley-beck-suicide-systemic-abuse-army-military-sexual-assault-rape/
Yes, these stories are difficult to read, but survivors know that are even more painful to live through. MST is a crisis that affects service members and veterans across the globe, and the best way to demand change is by refusing to stay silent and call for accountability. Too many have been forced to endure their pain in isolation and shame. Survivors deserve justice, accountability, and unwavering support—not just in the United States, but worldwide.
Surviving Assault Secrets: The Stunning Repercussions For Men That Speak Up (Part 2)
Brian, a Marine Corps veteran, shares the next part of his journey from Marine to civilian in this episode. Explore the lasting impacts of military sexual trauma, PTSD, and the urgent need for support for male survivors. Read the full story and access helpful resources.
Brian shares his story in the latest episode of The Silenced Voices of MST
In Part 2 of this 3-part series, Brian, a Marine Corps veteran, shares what it was like to navigate life after separating from the Marine Corps. He goes to college, tries to cope through partying, drinking, and promiscuity and doesn’t tell a soul that he’s a veteran. After landing a job with Jose Cuervo, he has a mental break that leads to him finding a magazine article that changes his life prior to leaving for China to rediscover himself. He explores finding his love of storytelling and expresses frustration with the lack of progress made by science in support of finding a treatment method for people with debilitating PTSD. Brian opens up about the struggles he faced after leaving the military, including the relentless grip of PTSD, the battle to be heard, and how he found strength in writing and advocacy.
Brian's Journey: From Dishonorable Discharge to Medically Retired
Picking up from where he left off in Part 1, Brian talks about the immediate aftermath, how his discharge affected his ability to get vital mental health care, and the lack of support he encountered after word spread among his peers. It was nearly impossible for him to seek justice, leaving him to process his trauma on his own. He earned the nickname “Blackout King” in college and hid the fact that he was a veteran from everyone and speaks about finding unhealthy coping mechanisms, including:
Substance use – Numbing the pain through alcohol and other substances.
Self-destructive behaviors – Using promiscuity as a means of dealing with what happened
Trying to receive help
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One of the most difficult battles Brian faced was not just recovering from trauma and unhealthy coping, but fighting for his experience to be acknowledged. He details the legal and bureaucratic hurdles that male MST survivors face when they seek recognition and support.
He shares his frustrations with the military’s reluctance to acknowledge male survivors and finally seeing that he was not alone in an article from GQ, titled “Son, Men Don’t Get Raped”. The article mirrored how MST, being improperlty discharged, and stigma impacts not only mental health care access but also disability claims and post-service support. This segment highlights the systemic failures that leave survivors without the help they desperately need.
Why Men’s Voices Matter
One of the major struggles for male MST survivors is finding therapy that actually works. Brian discusses the lack of specialized care for male survivors, the stigma of seeking help, and how many veterans are dismissed or misdiagnosed.
He shares how he eventually found therapists who understood his experience, and how trauma-focused therapy, meditation, and support groups played a role in his healing journey. Brian also calls out the lack of research and resources dedicated to male survivors of MST. He discusses:
The gaps in mental health services for veterans.
The need for better education about the true extent and definition of PTSD
The lack of research on military sexual trauma and PTSD that actually heals those who suffer
He stresses that change will happen if more survivors feel empowered to speak.
Click here to explore more survivors stories.
Brian notes that male survivors are often overlooked and underrepresented in conversations about sexual violence. He talks about the challenges of breaking through societal stigma and why it’s crucial for men to share their experiences.
"I found my path in storytelling..” – Brian
Key Takeaways:
Brian illustrates the struggles many veterans face after leaving the military when they've been harmed and are not discharged under honorable conditions
The importance of finding a voice for male survivors of sexual assault is crucial.
Coping mechanisms can vary widely, and what works for one may not work for another.
Storytelling can be a powerful tool for healing and advocacy.
Brian's experience with the legal system highlights the challenges faced by veterans seeking justice.
The need for societal recognition of male sexual assault survivors is urgent.
Cultural rituals and ceremonies can play a significant role in healing for veterans.
Mental health treatment is often a long and challenging process for veterans.
Brian's transition to storytelling reflects a broader need for veterans to share their experiences.
The fight for recognition and support for veterans with PTSD due to MST continues.
Join our mailing list to learn about upcoming episodes, new resources, and daily support.
Resources:
Visit Brian’s Website: 8Bmedia.com
Read More: GQ Article on Male Rape in the Military
Need help processing or want to share your story? Join our supportive community on Facebook: The Advocates of MST
If you are in crisis or need immediate support, call the Veterans Crisis Line: 988, then 1
Surviving Assault Secrets: The Stunning Repercussions For Men That Speak Up
Brian, a Marine Corps veteran, shares his journey from soldier to sexual assault survivor in this powerful episode. Explore the lasting impacts of military sexual trauma, PTSD, and the urgent need for support for male survivors. Read the full story and access helpful resources.
Brian shares his story in the latest episode of The Silenced Voices of MST
When we think of masculinity and military strength, the first image that pops into most people’s minds is a guy in the Marine Corps. Their motto says it all: The few. The proud. The Marines. It’s iconic, and so many young men and women respond to that message by enlisting or commissioning into the toughest service in the nation. But what happens more often than not is our blindness to the battles that men and women suffer in uniform among their peers. The amount of harassment and bullying is overlooked, and something like Military Sexual Trauma is hidden deeply away behind stoic facades and messages of honor and camaraderie.
In Part 1 of this deeply moving three-part series, Brian, a Marine Corps veteran, shares his journey from proud infantryman to survivor of sexual trauma and PTSD. His story gives us a look at the hidden experiences of male survivors in the military and the long-term repercussions of not only being victimized, but also speaking out and trying to receive help.
Brian's Journey: From Musician to Marine
Brian’s path to joining the Marines was similar to many that I’ve heard. It was a way to pay for school and his future musical aspirations, and military service was a family tradition. And although Brian had never felt pushed or encouraged to join by his family, a feeling of restlessness and boredom led him to a recruiter’s office at the age on 19, even after a friend warned him about joining. After a rough start and becoming fully immersed in USMC culture, he found himself and had a grueling, yet transformative experience while away at boot camp. Camaraderie, discipline, and feeling like he finally found his purpose shaped Brian, to the point that he excitedly called his parents one night saying, “This is what I want to do with my life.” But one serious injury and a night soon after changed his life forever.
What was supposed to be a night of NBA finals and letting off steam with a friend in San Diego, turned into a horrifying nightmare experience for both. Following their assaults, nothing was the same. Brian found himself isolated, bullied, and battling his mental health with little to no support. That led to trying to cope, by any means necessary… even career-ending ones.
Facing Harassment and Isolation
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After reporting the assault, Brian found himself in a worse situation than he could have ever imagined. Instead of providing relief, his words opened the door to constant harassment and ridicule from fellow Marines, men who were supposed to be his brothers in arms. Almost instantly, he was ostracized in a place that once felt like it had become home. This response, no matter how common, is tragic. The stigma that persists in “traditionally male environments” like the Infantry, toward male victims remains a driving force as to why more men do not come forward for help after incidents like these. Many suffer in silence, because the alternative is even worse.
Another run-in with law enforcement led to Brian facing a Medical Evaluation Board and Physical Evaluation Board process. Despite his trauma, he remained unsupported, even while navigating the difficult processes. This led to career-ending coping methods, and an Other than Honorable discharge from service, which further impacted his life, long after he hung up the uniform.
Why Men’s Voices Matter
Brian’s story is not just about his personal trauma but a broader conversation about the barriers male survivors face when speaking out. By sharing his story, Brian hopes to encourage other men to seek help and impress upon listeners the importance of creating safe spaces for survivors.
Click here to explore more survivors stories.
Key Takeaways:
Brian, a writer, producer, and Marine Corps veteran, shares his journey through trauma, isolation, and recovery.
His experience underscores the stigma surrounding male survivors of sexual assault, particularly within the military.
Brian faced harassment and isolation after reporting his assault, reflecting the cultural challenges in addressing sexual trauma among men.
His struggle with PTSD and substance use emphasizes the urgent need for better mental health resources for veterans.
Watch Part 1 on YouTube
In Part 1, Brian shares his profound journey from being a Marine Corps infantryman to a survivor of sexual trauma and PTSD. He discusses his initial motivations for joining the military, the transformative experiences during boot camp, and the life-altering incident that led to his struggles with mental health, unhealthy coping skills, and disillusionment with the Marine Corps. Brian frankly recounts the challenges he faced, including isolation, harassment, and the difficulties in seeking help after his discharge.
Join our mailing list to learn about upcoming episodes, new resources, and daily support.
Resources:
Visit Brian’s Website: 8Bmedia.com
Read More: GQ Article on Male Rape in the Military
Need help processing or want to share your story? Join our supportive community on Facebook: The Advocates of MST
If you are in crisis or need immediate support, call the Veterans Crisis Line: 988, then 1
Part 2 of Brian’s story will release on March 4, 2025.
BIG VOICE MST | Podcast News Update - February 19th
Hi Madvocates, we’re back after a very long break. It’s time to share some updates with the podcast as well as news about MST and our community of victims, advocates, and survivors.
Hi Madvocates, we’re back after a very long bresk. My apologies, I was quite ill for a long time. I had Covid, then an Upper Respiratory infection, the Covid again! Then my super intelligent self decided that getting the flu and Covid vaccine afterward was a great idea. Spoiler alert: It was not!
We are back though, and it time to share some updates with the podcast as well as news about MST and our community of victims, advocates, and survivors.
Our next episode will be starting on February 25, 2025. Our guest is named Brian, and he’s a former U.S. Marine Corps Infantryman. In the clip below, he shares the surreal experience of finding the GQ Article: https://www.gq.com/story/male-rape-in-the-military
So, another thing to bring up is The BIG VOICE. I wanted to bring that back, but with my schedule, adding another set of videos would not be feasible. But blog posts are! So I’ll be sharing a few news stories once a week to update the community on big news concerning MST globally, progress in accountability, and keeping an eye on how the new administration’s changes will affect us.
Soldier's tragic inquest sees more than 1,000 military women share stories of rape, abuse and harassment - as Army chief tells senior officers to 'step up'
Daily Mail UK
By Noor Qurashi and Andy Dolan
The head of the Army has written to senior officers condemning 'shameful behaviour' after more than 1,000 women shared stories following the suicide of a teenage soldier.
In a letter seen by MailOnline, General Sir Roly Walker said he was 'disgusted' by new allegations of sexual abuse and that the behaviour does not match 'our values and standards'.
It comes amid an inquest into the death of Gunner Jaysley Beck, 19, who was tragically found dead at Larkhill Camp in Wiltshire on December 15 2021.
She had previously complained about the behaviour of a senior colleague who 'pinned her down and tried to kiss her' as well as another 'psychotic and possessive' male colleague who she feared had hacked her phone.
An Army service inquiry report published in October 2023 said it was 'almost certain' an 'intense period of unwelcome behaviour' had been a causal factor in the teenager's death.
Now, hundreds of women have shared stories of being raped, abused and harassed while serving in the military as the inquest into Gunner Beck's death continues.
Posts uploaded anonymously to social media include allegations of women being pinned to the floor by male officers as well as reports of men trying to force their way into their female colleagues' rooms.
Read the article here: https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-14411121/soldier-inquest-100s-women-stories-sex-abuse.html
Soldiers Who Are Domestic Violence Victims
Psychology Today
By Lisa Aronson Fontes Ph.D. and co-authored with Rachel Arment, JD
No one welcomes or invites domestic abuse. Certain life experiences may make a person less likely to recognize it. Our experience suggests that military training, along with childhood abuse, may prime people to suffer intimate partner abuse in silence.
“I can see how a military background, where their intention is to break you down, set me up to accept life with my husband. In bootcamp and as an enlisted person in the army, mistreatment was normal. I was expected to perform well under stress and duress. I did not have much of my identity or self-worth left. When I got together with my abuser, I felt a lot of pride and identity in helping him and his kids. I cooked elaborate meals, made his place into a home, and kept his house clean. I sucked it up when he was nasty, demanding, and unkind.” –A former military service member who became a victim of domestic abuse
Enlistees are generally quite young when they join the military. Their training and early service may be their first job, their first time away from home, and their first time out of the United States, if they ship out. These new experiences come with the expectation of total dedication. Employment is contracted rather than at will. Someone who is kicked out or who chooses to resign is seen as failing in the core values.
Read the article: https://www.psychologytoday.com/sg/blog/invisible-chains/202502/soldiers-who-are-domestic-violence-victims
Lawmakers want answers on DoD’s pause on sexual assault training
Federal News Network
By Michele Sandiford
House Democrats are pressing the Defense Department about the military services pausing sexual assault prevention and response training programs. In a letter to Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth, the lawmakers said the decision is “not only irresponsible but also dangerous.” The lawmakers also said the law requires providing this training to incoming service members, civilian employees, first responders and staff directly supporting victims. At least some military branches have paused the program as the Defense Department works to comply with President Donald Trump’s executive order banning all diversity, equity and inclusion initiatives across the government.
Read the SAPR Oversight Letter: https://sarajacobs.house.gov/imo/media/doc/sapr_oversight_letter.pdf
Read the article: https://federalnewsnetwork.com/federal-newscast/2025/02/lawmakers-want-answers-on-dods-pause-on-sexual-assault-training/
Alright, that’s our post. Please feel free to share the clip, and tune in on February 25, 2025.
How Faith Helped Emily Overcome Adversity
Emily, an author and advocate, shares her journey of faith, healing, and finding purpose after experiencing SA and finding herself at her lowest point. She discusses the challenges of writing about her trauma and the importance of including the personal element in her books. Emily also talks about her faith and how it played a role in her healing process. She emphasizes the need for society to break the stigma around sexual assault and believe survivors. The conversation touches on the experiences of military spouses and the systemic issues they face when reporting domestic violence.
In our recent episode of Silenced Voices of MST, I had the privilege of speaking with Emily, a remarkable author, advocate, and public speaker who has transformed her personal challenges into a beacon of hope for others. Emily’s story is one of resilience, courage, and the role that faith can play in healing even the deepest wounds.
Click to watch the interview with Emily and Rachelle.
Emily’s Journey into Advocacy and Faith
Emily began her career with dreams of working in chemistry and business, but her life changed unexpectedly following a traumatic experience that left her grappling with trust, isolation, and self-worth. When she initially shared her story, she faced disbelief, blame, and rejection from those she turned to for support. This sense of betrayal not only intensified her pain but also led her to question her value and her place in the world.
In her journey to rebuild her life, Emily reconnected with her faith. She describes this as a turning point, where she began to find strength in her relationship with God. Although faith had been part of her childhood, it was only in her most challenging moments that Emily fully leaned into it, finding a new perspective and sense of purpose.
Finding a Community and Reclaiming Self-Worth
While navigating the aftermath of trauma, Emily discovered a women’s Bible study group on her college campus. This group gave her the support she needed to start viewing herself through a compassionate lens, and she eventually became a mentor herself, helping other women find strength through faith. Emily’s transformation from student to leader ignited a desire to help others who faced similar battles with self-worth and healing.
Writing as a Path to Healing
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Emily’s advocacy work didn’t stop with her small group. Her experiences inspired her to write, resulting in her book series, Broken Lenses. Through her writing, she challenges readers to see beyond societal labels and instead focus on self-compassion and spiritual growth. While her initial reluctance to share personal stories was strong, Emily’s writing coach encouraged her to be open, sharing that vulnerability would not only enhance her message but also resonate deeply with her readers.
The Power of Sharing and Forgiveness
Emily also discussed the importance of forgiveness in healing. For her, forgiveness wasn’t about excusing what happened but about reclaiming control over her life. By forgiving, Emily found that she could move beyond the pain and live without the shadow of resentment. This step was vital in her journey toward self-acceptance and inner peace, a message she now shares openly in her public speaking engagements.
Building a Legacy of Advocacy
Today, Emily works with Reveal to Heal International, a nonprofit focused on supporting sexual assault survivors within faith communities. She believes in creating safe spaces for survivors, encouraging them to reveal their pain as a step toward healing.
“We can’t heal what we don’t reveal,” she says, a mantra that underscores her work and her commitment to advocacy.
Embracing Vulnerability and Inspiring Change
Through her books and public speaking, Emily continues to challenge societal norms surrounding trauma and mental health, pushing for a culture where survivors feel supported and understood. She sees her role as an advocate not just as a calling but as a responsibility to empower others to find their voice. Her ultimate hope is to inspire a new generation to speak out and to foster a world where trauma survivors no longer have to navigate their journey alone.
Final Thoughts
Emily’s journey shows us the power of faith, community, and resilience in overcoming trauma. Her story serves as a reminder that, while pain may change us, it doesn’t have to define us. Through sharing her experiences and guiding others, Emily exemplifies the strength of the human spirit and the peace that can come from embracing our own truths.
For more about Emily’s work or to connect with her, visit her website, Emily Bernath Author. Her books are available, and she welcomes anyone seeking support or inspiration to reach out. Her story has motivated me to continue to share our voices, inspire change, and support each other in the journey toward healing.
Remember, our voices are powerful in the fight against military sexual trauma. Share your story, connect with others, and join us in the mission to end MST once and for all.
Enjoyed the Episode? Share Your Feedback!
If this episode moved you, inspired you, or gave you new insights, we’d love to hear about it! Please consider leaving a review on Apple Podcasts. Your feedback helps us reach more listeners and support our mission to give a voice to those impacted by military sexual trauma. Thank you for your support!
Top 11 Unique Resources For MST Victims And Survivors
If you're looking for more to ways to enhance your healing journey, this is the blog post for you!
If you're looking for more to ways to enhance your healing journey, this is the blog post for you!
1. The Silenced Voices of MST Podcast
The Silenced Voices Podcast shares personal stories from survivors of Military Sexual Trauma (MST), providing a supportive space where listeners can hear from people just like them. The podcast focuses on healing, empowerment, and reclaiming your voice after trauma, offering actionable steps and a sense of community.
How It Helps You: If you’re looking for real stories and guidance from fellow survivors, this podcast offers a safe space for validation and support.
Where to Get It: Listen on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or visit silencedvoicesmst.com.
2. The War Horse
The War Horse is a nonprofit newsroom dedicated to covering issues that impact the military and veteran community, with a focus on mental health, trauma, and personal stories. They publish investigative reports and first-person essays from veterans, offering a platform for stories of survival and resilience.
How It Helps You: Reading stories from other veterans can help you feel less alone in your experience. Their articles can offer validation and insight into the wider issues surrounding MST in the military.
Where to Get It: Visit thewarhorse.org.
3. Women Veterans Network (WoVeN)
WoVeN offers peer support groups specifically for women veterans, creating a safe and supportive space where women can connect, share experiences, and focus on personal wellness. These groups are either in-person or virtual, and they provide a strong sense of community and belonging.
How It Helps You: If you’re feeling isolated and want to connect with other women who understand your experience, WoVeN’s peer groups can offer the friendship, support, and connection you need.
Where to Get It: Learn more or find a group at wovenwomenvets.org.
4. Veterans Yoga Project
The Veterans Yoga Project offers trauma-sensitive yoga classes designed to help veterans reconnect with their bodies in a safe and healing way. The physical practice of yoga can help manage stress, anxiety, and symptoms related to trauma.
How It Helps You: If you’re looking for a gentle way to heal physically and mentally, their yoga programs are specifically tailored to veterans dealing with trauma, including MST.
Where to Get It: Find local classes or online resources at veteransyogaproject.org.
5. Beyond MST App
Beyond MST App Beyond MST is a free, secure, trauma-sensitive mobile app. The app has over 30 specialized tools and other features to help those who use it cope with challenges, manage symptoms, improve their quality of life and find hope. Users can also take brief assessments in the app, set self-care goals, track recovery progress, and learn more about MST and common concerns. The app keeps your information private; no account is needed, and any personal information entered in the app is not shared with anyone, including the VA.
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How It Helps You: You can use the app on your own or as a companion to formal treatment, and it may be helpful to survivors of other types of unwanted sexual experiences, too.
Where to Get It: You can download the app here https://mobile.va.gov/app/beyond-mst.
6. Service Women's Action Network (SWAN)
SWAN is dedicated to improving the lives of servicewomen and women veterans, with a focus on advocating for survivors of MST. They provide peer support, leadership opportunities, and tools for navigating the complex military and veteran systems.
How It Helps You: If you need legal advocacy or are looking for a strong community of women who’ve been in your shoes, SWAN can help you find your voice and get the support you deserve.
Where to Get It: Visit servicewomen.org for more information.
7. Healing Warrior Hearts
Healing Warrior Hearts offers free retreats designed for veterans who have experienced trauma, including MST. These retreats focus on emotional healing through group therapy, creative arts, and wellness practices, all in a peaceful and supportive setting.
How It Helps You: If you’re seeking a more immersive, in-person experience to heal from trauma, this retreat provides a safe space where you can process your emotions and reconnect with yourself.
Where to Get It: Apply for a retreat at healingwarriorhearts.org.
8. Shield of Sisters
Shield of Sisters creates safe spaces where courageous women can share their stories, access vital resources, and transform from surviving to thriving.
How It Helps You: IShield of Sisters believes that we are duty-bound to help our sister service members overcome the weight of Military Sexual Trauma.
Where to Get It: Explore their content at shieldofsisters.org.
9. Pink Berets
Pink Berets offers a variety of mental health and wellness services to female veterans and first responders, including those who have experienced MST. They provide equine therapy, art therapy, mindfulness programs, and more, all designed to help survivors heal in non-traditional ways.
How It Helps You: If you’re looking for alternative therapies to heal your mind and body, Pink Berets offers creative and accessible ways to address your trauma.
Where to Get It: Learn more at thepinkberets.org.
10. Forward Assist
This site offers life-enhancing, totally inclusive, educative, and advocacy-driven research projects that promote inclusion and facilitate the learning of new skills and systemic change.
How It Helps You: All Forward Assists projects and interventions are based upon the core Social Work values of service; social justice, dignity, self-determination, the importance of human relationships, integrity, and competence.
Where to Get It: Find more information at https://www.forward-assist.com/.
11. Veterans Crisis Line
For MST survivors in immediate distress, the Veterans Crisis Line provides 24/7 confidential support. Whether you’re feeling overwhelmed or need someone to talk to, trained responders are available to provide immediate help.
How It Helps You: If you’re in crisis and need someone to talk to, this resource offers fast, confidential support from responders who understand the unique challenges veterans face.
Where to Get It: Access the line at veteranscrisisline.net or by calling 1-800-273-8255 (press 1).
These 11 resources offer unique support for MST survivors and are designed to help you navigate the complexities of recovery, build community, and find strength. Whether you’re seeking peer support, alternative therapies, or advocacy, these organizations provide tools for healing in meaningful ways. Take the time to explore these options and see which are most helpful to you. Please leave a comment to share how it went!
Join Our Community for Support and Healing
If you're ready to connect with others who understand your journey,
I invite you to join The Advocates of MST.
Inside, you'll find a supportive community of survivors, along with tips, resources, and the latest news from Silenced Voices of MST. Together, we can take steps toward healing and reclaiming our power.
Join us today for support and real conversations—you're not alone in this.
A Special Update on The Silenced Voices of MST
Madvocates (that’s our new name, y’all!), as many of you know, I've been on a path of deep reflection and soul-searching recently. This journey has led me to reconsider how our podcast and YouTube channel can best serve you, our dedicated listeners and viewers. Over the past few months, I've reached out to many of you to ask what you truly want from this platform. Your feedback has been invaluable, and it’s clear that we’re ready for some changes.
Madvocates (that’s our new name, y’all!), as many of you know, I've been on a path of deep reflection and soul-searching recently. This journey has led me to reconsider how our podcast and YouTube channel can best serve you, our dedicated listeners and viewers. Over the past few months, I've reached out to many of you to ask what you truly want from this platform. Your feedback has been invaluable, and it’s clear that we’re ready for some changes.
More Value, More Support
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You’ve asked for more actionable resources, and I hear you. The episodes that have resonated the most with our community are those that offer tangible benefits—like discussions on float spas for PTSD relief or Pablo's story about using plant medicine for healing. Moving forward, we promise to focus on providing the resources that will genuinely improve your lives. Expect more episodes filled with coping strategies, alternative healing methods, and expert advice designed to empower you every step of the way.
Why the Big Voice is Taking a Break
The "Big Voice"—the news segment we've used to address military sexual trauma—will be taking a backseat for now. This decision wasn't made lightly. I realized that most of us who tune into the podcast or watch our YouTube channel are already well aware of the prevalence and severity of MST. It’s a reality we live with daily; it's not new to us, and constantly hearing about it in broad strokes doesn’t add meaningful value to our lives. Our community understands the depth of the issue. What we need now is not more reminders of how often these tragedies occur but rather resources, support, and practical tools to help us navigate the aftermath. That’s where our focus will shift.
So, how can you expect our content to change? Moving forward, we plan to produce more in-depth content rather than weekly summaries. This means fewer, but more substantial episodes and videos. We'll dive deep into specific stories, using Freedom of Information Act (FOIA) requests and other investigative tools to uncover how systemic failures occur and explore potential solutions. These deep dives will allow us to understand not just the “what” but the “why” and the “how”—how things went wrong, why they continue to go wrong, and what can be done to fix them. By focusing on these comprehensive investigations, we can offer a clearer path forward and actionable insights for our community.
Connecting Emotionally: The Power of Stories and Support
Our shift in focus also comes from a desire to connect with you on a deeper emotional level. I am committed to sharing stories that not only highlight the challenges we face but also the resilience and strength within our community. By spotlighting those who have been tirelessly fighting the good fight, we can inspire and support each other. I’ve connected with incredible individuals and organizations doing this work not for profit, but to protect others from what happened to them. It’s time these unsung heroes get the recognition they deserve.
Expanding Our Global Impact
Another exciting development is our expansion into the global landscape of MST. You may not know this, but military sexual trauma is not confined to any one country; it is a pervasive issue affecting militaries worldwide. I've had the privilege of connecting with people in different armed forces around the globe, and I told you the podcast was growing—I wasn't kidding! Together, we will create an international dialogue that highlights the universal nature of this problem, pushing for change wherever it is needed.
Practical Tools and Resources for Healing
In future episodes, expect practical, easy-to-implement advice that can help you navigate your healing journey. And if you become a member of our Patreon, you'll get access to them before anyone. Whether it's understanding how to get the most out of your C&P exam or finding new ways to cope with trauma, we're here to provide you with the tools you need. The podcast will focus on actionable content designed to make a real difference in your daily life. To continue receiving all these valuable insights and resources, make sure you're subscribed to our podcast and YouTube channel. Don't miss out on the latest episodes filled with expert advice, powerful stories, and practical tools to support your journey. Hit that subscribe button now and join us in this global movement for change.
Thank You for Your Patience and Support
I want to take a moment to thank each and every one of you—our listeners, viewers, readers—our Madvocates—for your patience as I navigate these changes. Your feedback and support have been a guiding light. I've realized that the work we're doing here is vital, and I’m committed to making this space as supportive, informative, and empowering as possible. I’ve been through quite a bit in the last year since starting this show, and I truly appreciate you going on this journey with me. It’s been an interesting one, to say the least, but I’m here for you, and I’m determined to continue growing and evolving this platform. This new direction feels like the best way forward, with a focus that is clear and unified.
What Do You Want to See Next?
As we move forward, I want to hear more from you. What kind of content would be most helpful? What topics do you want us to explore? Please share your thoughts in the comments below. Your input is crucial to ensuring that this podcast continues to serve its most important purpose: supporting and empowering survivors.
Share your thoughts and suggestions in the comments. What would you like to see from the podcast? How can we better support you as you heal? Your feedback is invaluable, and I’m committed to incorporating your ideas to make this podcast the best it can be.
Let’s keep moving forward, together.
<3 Rachelle
Self Care Secrets (Part 1): We All Float In Here
In our busy lives, "self-care" often conjures up images of bubble baths and spa days. While these are wonderful, self-care, especially for survivors of military sexual trauma (MST), encompasses much more. It's a vital part of healing and recovery, addressing deep emotional wounds and physical stress.
One groundbreaking self-care practice is sensory deprivation, or flotation therapy. This involves floating in a tank of saltwater at body temperature, in complete darkness and silence. It offers deep relaxation, mindfulness, stress relief, and improved sleep—benefits particularly valuable for MST survivors.
If you're curious about this unique method, find a local flotation therapy center and prepare for a journey of self-discovery and healing. For more innovative self-care tips, subscribe to "The Silenced Voices of MST" podcast and join our community of survivors and advocates. Share your experiences in the comments—your story could inspire others!
When we hear the term "self-care," many of us immediately envision bubble baths, spa days, or other indulgent activities that provide temporary relaxation. While these aesthetic experiences can be beneficial, self-care encompasses a far broader range of practices, many of which go beyond the surface level. For survivors of military sexual trauma, self-care is not just a luxury but a vital component of healing and recovery. This series aims to dive deeper into self-care, highlighting its importance and exploring practices that might not immediately come to mind but can have profound impacts on your well-being.
Why Self-Care is Crucial for MST Survivors
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Self-care is the act of deliberately taking steps to preserve or improve one’s health. For MST survivors, self-care is an essential part of the healing process. Trauma can take a significant toll on both mental and physical health, leading to conditions such as anxiety, depression, and PTSD. Engaging in self-care helps to mitigate these effects by providing necessary relief, fostering resilience, and promoting a sense of control over one’s life.
Emotional Healing: Trauma disrupts your emotional balance, often leading to feelings of fear, anger, and sadness. Self-care practices help to manage these emotions, providing a way to process and release them in a healthy manner.
Physical Health: Stress and trauma can weaken the immune system, increase blood pressure, and lead to other health issues. Self-care activities, especially those that involve physical movement, can improve overall health and contribute to a sense of well-being.
Mental Clarity: Trauma can cloud your mind and make it difficult to think clearly or make decisions. Regular self-care practices can enhance mental clarity and focus, making it easier to navigate daily challenges.
Groundbreaking Self-Care Practice: The Power of Sensory Deprivation
One innovative self-care practice that many people might not readily think of is sensory deprivation, specifically through the use of flotation therapy, also known as float tanks or sensory deprivation tanks. This practice involves floating in a tank filled with salt water at body temperature, in complete darkness and silence. Here’s why this unconventional self-care method can be particularly beneficial for MST survivors:
Deep Relaxation: The absence of sensory input allows your body and mind to enter a state of deep relaxation. This can be especially beneficial for those who struggle with anxiety and PTSD, as it provides a respite from constant hyper-vigilance and stress.
Enhanced Mindfulness: Floating in a sensory deprivation tank can help you achieve a meditative state, promoting mindfulness and a deeper connection with your inner self. This can facilitate emotional healing and self-discovery.
Reduced Stress and Pain: The buoyancy provided by the saltwater can alleviate physical pain and tension. This is particularly helpful for MST survivors who may experience chronic pain or physical discomfort as a result of their trauma.
Improved Sleep: Many people who use sensory deprivation tanks report improved sleep quality. For MST survivors, who often struggle with insomnia or disrupted sleep, this can be a crucial benefit.
How to Get Started with Sensory Deprivation
If you’re interested in exploring sensory deprivation as a self-care practice, here’s how to get started:
1. Find a Local Facility: Search for spas or wellness centers that offer flotation therapy. Many urban areas have facilities specifically designed for sensory deprivation experiences.
2. Prepare Yourself Mentally: The idea of complete darkness and silence can be daunting. Prepare yourself by researching what to expect and starting with shorter sessions if needed.
3. Set an Intention: Before entering the tank, set a clear intention for your session. This could be to relax, to explore your thoughts, or to simply experience the sensation.
4. Stay Open-Minded: It may take a few sessions to fully acclimate to the experience. Stay open-minded and give yourself time to adjust.
5. Reflect on the Experience: After your session, take some time to reflect on how you feel. Note any changes in your stress levels, physical sensations, or emotional state.
Self-care for MST survivors is not just about surface-level relaxation; it’s about finding innovative and effective ways to support your healing journey. Sensory deprivation, through flotation therapy, offers a unique and profound method to achieve deep relaxation, mindfulness, and stress relief. By exploring this unconventional self-care practice, you can uncover new paths to healing and well-being.
If you’re curious about how sensory deprivation can benefit your recovery journey, consider booking a session at a local flotation therapy center. For more groundbreaking self-care ideas and support, subscribe to "The Silenced Voices of MST" podcast and join our community of survivors and advocates at The Advocates of MST on Facebook.
Have you ever tried sensory deprivation or flotation therapy? How did it impact your mental and physical health? Share your experiences in the comments below – your insights could inspire others to explore this innovative self-care practice.
Finally! MST Survivors Now Have Options To Upgrade Discharge Characterization
In a significant move, the Department of Defense has announced new options for veterans to upgrade their discharge characterizations. This decision aims to provide veterans with the opportunity to correct or upgrade their military records, which can impact their access to benefits, employment opportunities, and personal pride.
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The recent changes are particularly relevant for veterans who faced challenges such as mental health issues, including PTSD, or experienced Military Sexual Trauma (MST), leading to less-than-honorable discharges. These updates can potentially transform the lives of many veterans, offering them the recognition and benefits they deserve.
What Does This Mean for Veterans?
For many veterans, a discharge characterization that is less than honorable can be a significant barrier to accessing VA benefits, securing employment, and integrating back into civilian life. The new policies make it easier for veterans to appeal their discharge statuses, particularly if they can demonstrate that their conduct was influenced by conditions such as PTSD, TBI, or MST.
How to Apply for an Upgrade
Veterans seeking to upgrade their discharge characterization can now navigate a more streamlined process. The Department of Defense provides detailed guidance and support for veterans, including legal assistance through various veterans' organizations. The application involves submitting evidence that supports the case for an upgrade, such as medical records, statements from mental health professionals, and testimonials from fellow service members.
For more detailed information on how to apply, you can visit the Department of Defense's official guidance.
https://www.defense.gov/News/News-Stories/Article/Article/3796077/veterans-have-options-to-upgrade-discharge-characterization/
The Impact of Discharges
At The Silenced Voices of MST, we understand the profound impact that a less-than-honorable discharge can have on MST survivors. Many of our listeners have faced similar challenges and have felt the weight of their discharge status affecting their lives long after their service.
In our upcoming episodes, we will be diving deeper into this topic, discussing the implications of these new changes, and providing practical advice and resources for those looking to upgrade their discharge characterization. We will also share personal stories from MST survivors who have successfully navigated this process, offering hope and guidance to those still struggling.
If you or someone you know is affected by this issue, we encourage you to take action:
1. Subscribe to The Silenced Voices of MST: Stay informed with our latest episodes where we will cover this topic extensively.
2. Join The Advocates Community: Connect with fellow veterans and MST survivors, share your experiences, and find support.
3. Seek Legal Assistance: Reach out to veterans' organizations for help with your discharge upgrade application.
We believe that by sharing our stories and supporting each other, we can drive change and ensure that every veteran receives the recognition and benefits they deserve. Join our Facebook group, The Advocates of MST to connect with people that understand exactly what you’ve been through.
1. Have you or someone you know applied for a discharge upgrade? What was your experience like?
2. How has your discharge status impacted your life after military service?
3. What resources or support would you like to see from The Silenced Voices of MST to help with discharge upgrades?
Stay tuned for more on this important topic in our upcoming podcast episodes. Together, we can amplify our voices and continue the fight against MST.
For more insights and support, subscribe to The Silenced Voices of MST.
How To Overcome The Feeling Of Being Broken After MST
In the aftermath of military sexual trauma (MST), many survivors grapple with feelings of brokenness and isolation. It's a journey marked by pain and resilience, much like the Japanese art of Kintsugi, which repairs broken pottery with gold, highlighting rather than hiding the cracks. This philosophy teaches us that our experiences, no matter how painful, are integral to our story and can add to our strength and uniqueness.
Healing begins with acknowledging and grieving the life you once had. It’s essential to mourn what was lost, but also to embrace the new person you are becoming. Rebuilding trust, particularly in oneself, is a gradual process that involves finding supportive communities, like our Facebook group, The Advocates of MST. Here, we connect, share, and support each other in our journeys.
Reclaiming your body and finding peace are crucial steps in healing. Engaging in mindfulness practices, such as yoga or simply enjoying small moments of joy, can help reconnect with your body and regain a sense of safety. Each day brings challenges and opportunities for growth, reminding us that healing is a continuous process.
To those who feel broken, know that your cracks are not flaws but stories of survival, courage, and strength. Embrace the philosophy of Kintsugi, allowing your scars to shine with the gold of resilience. Healing is possible, and it’s okay to take each step at your own pace. Remember, you are not alone, and together, we can find strength in our shared experiences and beauty in our scars.
As the host of "The Silenced Voices of MST," I often get deeply personal questions from listeners who are navigating the aftermath of military sexual trauma (MST). One of the most relatable and tough statements I’ve encountered is, “I feel broken by my assault.” That’s something that takes so much courage to divulge to a complete stranger. It’s a sentence that resonates with profound pain and vulnerability, and it’s one that requires a nuanced response. It immediately makes sense, and it hurts to hear or see someone hurting like that
The Concept of Kintsugi
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In Japanese culture, there exists an art form known as Kintsugi. This ancient technique of repairing broken pottery with lacquer mixed with powdered gold, silver, or platinum is something a lot of people who have been traumatized find in their search for meaning or peace. Instead of hiding the cracks, Kintsugi highlights them, celebrating the pottery’s history and the beauty that can come from imperfection. The philosophy behind Kintsugi is that breakage and repair are part of an object's history, and rather than something to disguise, they should be embraced and celebrated.
Although I don’t think anyone would ever celebrate their assault, I do believe you can celebrate growth, rebirth, and your ability to help others with the life lessons learned on your path to healing. When we apply the principles of Kintsugi to our own lives, particularly in the context of MST, we begin to see that our experiences—no matter how painful—are integral parts of our story. They do not diminish our value but rather enhance our uniqueness and strength. I, too, felt completely worthless after repeated traumas and feeling like everyone could see that something was wrong with me. But now, I show the cracks, because that’s where my inner light shines through. The gold in our cracks symbolizes resilience, courage, and the beauty that emerges from our journey through adversity.
Grieving the Life You Once Had
One of the first steps in healing from MST is acknowledging and grieving the life you once had. It’s essential to give yourself permission to mourn the loss of the person you were before the assault. This grief is valid, and it’s a crucial part of the healing process.
I remember the days when I felt like a shadow of my former self, mourning the loss of my the life I had known as a military kid, my sense of security when seeing uniforms, and my trust in my judgement. How could I have been so wrong? This grief was a heavy burden, and I ran from it for a long time trying to hide it under a thick veneer of alcohol, drugs, and tons of bad decisions. But finally acknowledging it allowed me to start the process of healing. It’s okay to feel this way. It’s okay to miss the person you used to be. Not only that, it’s okay to grieve the person you could have been. Let yourself grieve, but also internalize that this grief is not the end of your story.
Learning to Feel Safe in Your Body Again
Feeling safe in your body again is one of the most challenging aspects of recovery. MST often leaves us feeling disconnected from their bodies, plagued by anxiety, and haunted by memories of the assault. Reconnecting with your body is a gradual process, and it’s different for everyone. I remember trying to scrub my skin off one night because I just felt so disgusted with all of myself its not uncommon to hear something like this from survivors.
For me, learning to feel safe in my body involved exploring various therapeutic practices such as yoga, mindfulness, and somatic experiencing. These practices helped me to ground myself, to feel my feet on the earth, and to slowly reclaim my body as a safe space. It’s about small, intentional steps—feeling the warmth of the sun on your skin, the comfort of a soft blanket, the rhythm of your breath. Living with intention rather than drifting through life made the difference. These moments of mindfulness can help you rebuild a sense of safety and control.
Learning to Trust Again
Trust is often shattered after an assault, and rebuilding it can feel completely foreign. Trusting others, and even trusting yourself, may seem impossible. But trust can be rebuilt, piece by piece.
Start by surrounding yourself with people who respect and support you. This might be friends, family, or members of a support group. It could even be an online community centered on fixing and selling antique clocks. If it’s an activity where you feel at peace and can create a sense of self-worth, go for it! It’s important to have a safe space where you can express yourself without fear of judgment. Over time, these positive interactions can help you begin to trust again.
Trusting yourself is equally important. It’s about listening to your intuition and respecting your own boundaries. Remember, it’s okay to take things slow. I would t say to throw yourself into an environment full of wild cards where people may behave inappropriately and unpredictably (like a crowded bar or dance club). Easing back into being around other people is like getting into a hot tub. Healing is not a linear process, and it’s perfectly normal to have setbacks.
Finding Peace After Trauma
Finding peace after something as violent as MST is quite the task. It’s about integrating the traumatic experience into your life without allowing it to define you. It’s about reclaiming your story and finding moments of joy and tranquility amidst the chaos.
For me, peace comes in moments of stillness—watching a sunset, taking the time to create a really great meal from Pinterest, or losing myself in a good book. These moments remind me that despite the trauma, life still holds beauty and wonder. Peace is not a constant state but a series of fleeting moments that, when woven together, create a tapestry of resilience. And remember, you deserve peace. You are not undeserving because you’ve known pain. You will never be undeserving of peace no matter what you went through or what you had to do to survive. If anyone tries to make you feel that way, kick them out of your life immediately.
Embracing the Journey: Each Day is Work
Although I have reached a place of stability, each day is still work. I have bad days, days when the weight of my experiences feels too heavy to bear. But I also have good days, days when I feel proud of how far I’ve come. It’s important to acknowledge both. Healing is not about reaching a destination but about navigating the journey with compassion and courage.
I enjoy seeing myself handle a situation that years ago would have sent me in a tailspin. Now, I congratulate myself for find the right coping skills and knowing when I need to take a break and get recentered.
Focusing on Self-Pride
One of the most empowering aspects of my healing journey has been learning to focus on becoming proud of myself. It’s about celebrating the small victories—getting out of bed on a difficult day, reaching out for help, or simply taking a moment to breathe. These victories may seem insignificant to others, but to us, they are monumental.
I’m not saying to become arrogant. Everyone can see through falsely confident people, no matter what they tell themselves. There’s a reason arrogant people don’t have many friends, or if they do, they are frenemies. What I mean is to employ frequent positive self-talk!
I remind myself daily that I am proud of who I am and what I have overcome. This pride is not about ignoring the pain but about recognizing my strength and resilience. It’s about understanding that my worth is not defined by my trauma but by my ability to rise above it. I encourage myself through each step of the day. “Yes, I did it!” Or “Great job, girlfriend!”
It’s not stupid if it works
Finding Strength in Listening to Stories
One of the reasons I’ve been able to gain strength and host about something that is really triggering is because I know that I am fighting for the person I used to be and for many people who will live after me. Each story I listen to with my guests and audience is a testament to our collective resilience. It’s a reminder that while our experiences are painful, we are not alone. Help is out there!
The Advocates of MST: A Community of Support
In addition to the podcast, I founded the Facebook group, The Advocates of MST, as a space for survivors to connect, share their experiences, and support one another. This community has become a vital part of my healing process. Seeing others find their voice and gain strength from our shared experiences reminds me daily of the importance of our work. We are also going to start activism in a unique and interesting way in order to continue our fight for accountability in the Armed Services.
A Message to Those Who Feel Broken
To those who feel broken by their assault, I want you to know that you are not alone. Your feelings are valid, and your pain is real. But remember, like the pottery in Kintsugi, your cracks are not flaws—they are the places where the light escapes and tells your story of survival, courage, and strength.
Grieve the life you once had, but also embrace the person you are becoming. Reclaim your body as a safe space, rebuild trust in yourself and others, and seek moments of peace amidst the chaos. Each day is work, but each day is also an opportunity to grow, to heal, and to be proud of yourself.
Healing from MST is a complex and deeply personal journey. It’s about finding strength in brokenness, embracing the philosophy of Kintsugi, and allowing your cracks to shine with the gold of resilience and courage. It’s about grieving, rebuilding, and reclaiming your life, one step at a time.
As a survivor and an advocate, I am here to tell you that healing is possible. It’s a journey filled with challenges, but also with breakthrough moments of profound beauty and strength. Some days, you’ll feel invincible. Other days you’ll want to. E invisible. It’s okay! Be proud of your journey.
I hope this note is a source of comfort and inspiration for those who are navigating the difficult path of healing from MST.
Remember, you are not alone, and together, we can find strength in our brokenness and beauty in our scars.
A former U.S. Air Force veteran shares her firsthand account of harassment, retaliation, and Military Sexual Trauma within the ranks. Her story reveals how systemic failures and abusive leadership drive survivors into silence, and how writing became her path to recovery. Read this guest post on The Silenced Voices of MST to understand the hidden cost of Military Sexual Trauma and what accountability must look like inside the armed forces.